If you work in retail or in any work place where you need to deal with “people”… a “good day” can easily become a “bad day” with just one misbehaving or rude person you encounter
I am not sure about you, but I was having a pretty OKAYish day trying to deal with being at work…then this “atrocity” of a person…comes in and personally acts very rude to me.
As he was a new client to my work place and only staying a short time, I didn’t bother telling anyone about it.
But, I just felt…so tempted not to do my job..it is people like him that really make me hate my job and just quit sometimes. There can be 39 clients that don’t make trouble..but it takes JUST ONE rude one..who tells you to “Hurry up”. and does not listen to what you have instructed them to do when you made it so clear to them and…then has the indecency answers their phone in front of you and tells the person on the phone that there is “An annoying lady who won’t let him leave”. while staring at you. Then when you say something back, they tell you “Stop eavesdropping”. Mate. You Obviously did that in front of my to try piss me off. We are in a dosing room, no one else there. Can I honestly NOT hear your comment?
FFS., Just thinking about it makes me soo angry.
There were so many things I wanted to say or do…why is it that in this sort of jobs, we have to take this abuse? Is it worth the money you get paid for?
I sometimes ask myself this…is this what you dignity, mental health and motivation to work is worth?
Getting harassed by someone who is ungrateful and rude, whom your job is to help them..it is SO hard..
I was really really not happy. I talked to the manager that normally works there on the phone..and she said, You can refuse to help them. You can refuse to dose someone. I’ve never had the guts to refuse to dose someone on the basis that they have been rude to me…it is far more scary for me to refuse them and make them angry. I honestly fear for my life sometimes..I get so paranoid every time I go in and out of work. Looking left and right before running to my car and locking the doors.
It’s hard though. I don’t want to provoke someone even further or cause trouble for other staff. But, where does my rights and limitations go up to? How much do I have to put up with?
These are the things that health professionals go through daily. We want to help YOU, but you (not you, but you know that rude person) want to make our lives harder.
It makes me into someone not as happy and that anger passes on through me to get angry even more easily when some clients, come OUT of hours…past the dosing time and the time that I am supposed to get paid for…and expect you to dose them.
I am in the midst of trying to grow more resilient and more assertive. At the same time, I don’t want to come off as rude or standoffish. I don’t know why, one part of me wants to be their best-friend…but the other knows that they can stab me in the back anytime.
I am not sure what works…being so lenient and nice to them, so that they walk all over you. Or being unapproachable, not being able to have a good transparent relationship with them?
I am not there for long…but it makes work a real ..struggle town..knowing who you have to deal with and not having/knowing who to ask for help..
Anyways, the point of this post was to give some ways that you can help alleviate the anger that rises when faced with rude clients/patients.
- Just remember, they will be gone soon and you don’t have to spend the rest of the day with them-hopefully.
- Remember they are just one of many clients you have and like a bag of chocolates, you never know which one you will get. (Misquoted from Forest Gump)
- Just try to smile and be the bigger person and tell them politely what they are doing that makes you feel upset.
- IF they try to get back at you even more, use some empty threats (or real)…like for example, you don’t have to serve them if you feel you are in danger…i.e. Can call security guard (if you have one) or the police (which I have done before).
- Just remember, they purposely desire a reaction of you, they want to see how far they can push you. This is where you have to learn to stick up for yourself. If you let them bully you once, they will do it again! This is a reflection and is a representation of their personality/behaviour and is not indicative of the type of person that you are. They are throwing their insecurities/bad stuff on you…but that doesn’t make you bad.
- Make it clear what the rules are from the start. Tell them so that they have no excuse next time, make a sign to put right in front of them or make it a rule to reiterate it each time.
- It is important to document what you said and what happened. I think there are incident reports that you can write online..I didn’t do one today, but I might write it up tomorrow. Documentation is your friend. Because…you never know when you might need to recount something that happened.
- Put on your best FAKE smile and still try to say thank you when you leave…got this online…KILL THEM WITH KINDNESS (like that song). While I failed with this today…there is always next time. I am sure I will get numerous opportunities to grow in these skills.
- Reflect on what you can do better next time…what can be improved? Should we have a sign to say that they must wait a certain time? To make it crystal clear? The old clients know the rules, the new ones are more cocky and despite you tell them, they will try bend or break the rules.
- Make sure you tell someone about it…I guess the only way that change can happen is to let those working around you to be aware of it too. It helps when they know that their bad behaviour was not swept underneath the counter but that you reported it. When bullies get found out, they lose their power.
I am not sure 100% of these things will work, but it did help me to realise, that there are some things you can do in the midst of a difficult challenging scenario. Of course, safety is very important especially in these sort of scenarios. Provoking people is very dangerous..Just gotta do your best and put on a fake smile and bitch about it later on your blog.