Catch 22 – Research Projects

When you start investigating and looking into doing research, unfortunately you will affect the circumstances that you are in.

Research has not been my strong point or forte unfortunately… I just get overwhelmed, bored, and tired of doing research. Unfortunately, as part of my residency position, I will have to complete a research project. Coming up with a project hasn’t been that difficult, but implementation and designing. Holy shit. So hard..🥲🥲🥲it’s almost been a year, yet I still haven’t been able to even start my project yet. Getting ethics has been a major road block… there are so many hurdles to jump through even before I can even go through to ethics… As a resident, my project has to go through the Education committee before going to the Research Committee, and then finally after they all disseminate my Research Expression of Interest.. then can finally go to the Ethics Committee 🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲 just too hard if you ask me.

It sucks now.. the waiting game before starting the Research.. but I suppose in a years time… maybe I will be pretty happy with where I have ended up? Perhaps I would have finished/close to finishing my research project..

WHO KNOWS

Am I going to make a difference in the world? Maybe not?

I love my project… yet I also hate it with passion. How I long to be a normal employee without all the additional responsibilities, research, and expectations… Yet, I know this is a stepping stone for something greater. Something better. Who knows

Badminton Tournament

Apologies for the 3 day delay in writing about the badminton tournament I participated in on Saturday. Just participated.. didn’t get any awards or prizes from any of the games.

I felt it was more organised than back in Adelaide.. There was approximate times that certain events would be starting, which saves most people from having to be there the whole day (which happens often in Adelaide). What’s also good is that you finish all your games in a day. So if you make it to semis or finals, it’s all done on the same day, whereas in Adelaide the finals are always on the Sunday. Often, when I get to the finals, I am so tired and achey from playing the whole entire day the day before… and I play really bad.

One event was $25, and any additional events were $20 on top… which is similar to what happens in Adelaide. You could enter a maximum of six events across the two days 😂😂.

I only entered one event, and that was mixed doubles D grade… it was my first time entering into D grade… because in Adelaide the lowest grade is C grade. HOWEVER, the lowest grade in Melbourne is actually E grade which apparently is strictly fo beginners.

In comparison to Adelaide, Melbourne is definitely more organised .. however, I did notice for the first few or of games , we had to umpire our own games and there were no umpire chairs to sit on either.. it’s only up to when you get into semis or finals do they move the nicer courts

First Badminton Tournament in Melbourne

Today, it a special day for me! I am playing my first interstate badminton tournament in Melbourne. Post lockdown, I think this is the first tournament since Covid hit last year…. so it’s both exciting and potentially a super spreading event. But it’s a non-contact sport, so should be okay.

I am only playing one event, Mixed Doubles D grade! I’ve never played D grade in my life.. to give you context, in Adelaide (my home town), the lowest grade you can play is C grade and that’s basically for beginners or low level players… over the years of playing, I’ve slowly moved up so I was playing A and B level, but mostly A. I wouldn’t be allowed to play in C grade anymore…

Moving interstate, I feel like I sort of have a clean slate, no one knows me here..I am a nobody….so why not enter the lowest grade?? Well, to be fair, there is an E grade.. which is just for beginners, and apparently they will disqualify you if you aren’t…

So, in anticipation, I am will document how my first interstate badminton tournament experience is like! I will update later on today when I arrive…

Day 2 Post Pfizer Covid Vaccine

It’s been about 36 hours after I received my first dose of the Pfizer Covid Vaccine. I have to say, I felt fine right after it.. no anaphylaxis, no pain, all was well. But progressively through out the day, the pain in my left arm (where I got it done), became more and more noticeable. Throughout the day, I began feeling more tired than usual and I was getting some difficulties breathing/coughing. I mean, I do have to say I have asthma and Hayfever, but I am not sure if it was due to the vaccine.. but I did notice this.

12 hours post vaccine I was noticing I was incredibly sleepy, tired, and fatigued, but at night I had RSVP’ed to badminton so I forced myself to go exercise, but the pain in my left arm was intense. I got home and couldn’t do much more, everything felt so hard and difficult to do.

I eventually got ready for bed, and that’s when I noticed the pain of my left arm, I could not sleep on my left side at all due to the pain

24 hours post vaccination, I woke up with a massive headache, almost like I was hungover or something… the whole body lethargic feeling was incredibly strong. I contemplated whether or not I should go to work, I was worried about falling asleep at the wheel or making mistakes at work. I decided i would call in sick and also let them know I had just received my first dose of the covid vaccine.

I was given an informational leaflet by the vaccination staff which had a QR code in which I could record side effects from the vaccine. I recorded exactly what I have just typed out above and also stated what treatments I have used to help with the symptoms.

After resting in bed for most of the day, I am feeling slightly better. I am taking 2x paracetamol regularly to help with the pain, body aches, and fevers. I am trying to keep very hydrated and to eat healthy.

Fingers crossed the worst is over! I have been told if my symptoms persist till tomorrow, I may need a covid swab to ensure I haven’t been exposed to the virus…

Covid Vaccine

This morning, I arrived an hour earlier to work to get my Covid-19 Vaccine… I wasn’t sure which one I would be getting, but when I arrived, I was given an information sheet as I waited to get thhe jab. It’s a momental day for me! We waited so long for this vaccine and finally it’s here!

Its been 3.5 hours since I got the jab, there was no immediate pain, but now my left arm feels a bit numb and weak… I am so glad it’s not my right arm. On the information sheet, we had a QR code which allows us to record any side effects we may have to the vaccine. We were then monitored by a nurse for 15 minutes post vaccination … and for me, it was straight back to work. As I am rotating to another hospital next week, I booked my next appointment on the 24th of March.

I will let you know if there’s anything weird or interesting about having the vaccine.

Failing Adulting

This week has been a fail week for me…I have failed as an adult.

I have not washed my dishes all week..My laundry is everywhere and I have no clean clothes anywhere..I am eating shrimp crackers and ice cream every day for dinner.

The garbage is piling up and there is mould growing in my organic bin.

My whole room is a mess and things are everywhere…There is no fresh food in my fridge and it’s looking pretty bare at the moment..

I haven’t cooked in forever and the grapes in my fridge are rotting.

I am so tired and I have no energy to clean..I just wanna… order take away…eat out..and go play. I don’t want this adulting life….If only someone was there to cook and clean for me.. xD

On a side note, the covid vaccines has reached Australia and my workplace will be vaccinating us soon..

On another side note, I have new neighbours who LOVE shouting on the top of the lungs and walking up and down all night.

They also play DOOF DOOF music at MIDNIGHT…

And I know my real estate agent will not do anything. 😦

But I guess it will not hurt to send an email….

Freedom

Freedom again.. so we finished our five day lock down on Thursday as promised by our prime minister. The taste of freedom is both exhilarating and also feels foreign, almost wrong… going in and out of lockdowns makes you feel on the edge… when will the next one be? Do you enjoy your freedom now and pay the consequences later? What if you go to a hotspot accidentally?

The constant anxiety of not knowing is both scary and yet exciting times to be in.

I wish I could be part of the Covid Vaccination team… but I am not sure.. I am still undergoing my residency training now and I am not sure how it would work..

I am glad that a vaccine is out, I wonder how the world is going to look like once we are vaccinated. Is social distancing here to stay?

Melbourne lockdown #3

Yesterday afternoon, we were all told that at midnight the entire state of Victoria will be plunged back to a Stage Four lockdown for five days. This was in response to another leak of Coronavirus from someone in Hotel Quarantine.. if they know that these returned travellers are at a high risk of having Covid-19, why aren’t the rooms better ventilated? In this case, the returned traveller had asthma and was using a nebuliser to help him breathe… It was well known since the first lockdown that all nebulisers in hospital were strongly discouraged due to the risk of droplets of covid being spread. Instead, using the puffer was recommended to be used through a spacer instead.

Obviously, you do the obvious.. you go out and enjoy the last few hours of freedom. The freedom of not having to wear a mask outside, being able to dine in restaurants, being able to play badminton and going shopping… I did what I miss most, playing badminton with friends ☺️

It’s bittersweet and a little depressing to go from almost normal back to being in lockdown. I am just hoping and praying it will only be for five days and that we can go back to “normal”.

The rules that are in place until Midnight on Wednesday the 17th of Feb:

We can only leave work for four essential reasons:

1. Work/Study that can’t be done from home.

2. Caring for someone or getting medical attention.

3. Essential shopping for groceries/pharmacy/etc.

4. 2 hours of exercise a day.

Other rules come back, non-essential retail stores must be closed. Masks must be worn at all times except for strenuous exercise or if they have a medical condition.

We also cannot travel more than 5km to go shopping for groceries, unless the nearest shop is more than 5km away.

No visitors are allowed to your home, unless it’s your intimate partner.

All indoors/outdoor sports are not allowed, unless you are an professional.

I am not sure if there is a ‘curfew’ like last time, but there isn’t much to do anyways.

Also, there are no visitors allowed in Hospital or Nursing homes unless in special circumstances.

Fingers crossed Melbourne 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

Happy Chinese New Year!

I write this on the first day of the New Year… for the first time I have moved out from home and have not celebrated Lunar New Year dinner with my family. I realise that there are so many traditions that my mother kept and just did and I just took it for granted.

Living alone meant that many of these traditions were only made known to me when people asked me at work if I celebrated..

It’s sad to know that traditions aren’t held so highly with me, as the first child of a migrant, will I in the future keep my culture alive if ai ever had children? Or do I make my own culture?

Being Environmentally friendly to your money

I was having this thought and discussion this week…about how being environmentally friendly can lead to you saving money in the long run.

It may seems costly at first to invest in environmentally friendly products, but in the long run it can save you money as-well as help save the planet.

For example, instead using disposable forks and knives at restaurants/takeaways, how about bringing your own travel utensils kit?

Then there’s reusable drink bottles that can be refilled time and time again. Everyone also knows about the metal straws, which are also resistant to heat.

Food wraps made from beewax are costly to buy at first but think of the money saved from using disposable clingwrap.

Having reusable calico or strong bags for shopping, so you don’t have to pay for a plastic or paper bag. They also tend to be stronger , more durable and versatile, and bonus some have cute patterns!

Solar panels! Expensive upfront costs, but over time they help power your house and also can earn you money when you produce more electricity than you can use, so it goes into the grid.

Water tanks!!! Most people have water tanks in their gardens (if they have one). It is great for watering plants, cleaning cars, or to be used for flushing toilets in the home. Save money on water! Why not?

Riding a bike for short distances. This equals exercise AND transportation, as well as being fun for some people.

This is all I can think of for now, but I think you get the picture, but being environmentally friendly, you can also satisfy that stingy, money saving person in you 🤣

Do you just become sick or do you make yourself sick?

Do we just suddenly fall sick for no reason or are we the ones treating our bodies so bad that it forces us to take much needed rest?

I think I know the answer… I think I sip my ice old glass of soy milk because my coffee is too hot and I already have several mouth ulcers in my mouth.

My blood tests all came back “normal”, nothing out of the ordinary, no infection, not low in vitamin D, iron, or vitamin b12. My blood pressure standing and sitting were “fine”, but I still feel dizzy when walking around. I still feel tired and so fatigued that my mind becomes blank and I barely can make the drive to work without falling asleep. Burn out is real and your body will let you know it has had ENOUGH. You need rest it says…

If you are constantly worrying about work or thinking things will crumble if you aren’t there, then I feel you are overestimating the abilities of other people. If you are always doing everything, then how will people ever learn how to do something? So the cycle continues, because that’s how you learnt in the first place right? When you were thrown into the deep end, it’s either you sink to the bottom or you force yourself to learn to swim.

But you swim too hard, too fast, and you tire out. You forget that you aren’t in some olympic 100m swim race, you are in a marathon called ‘Life’. It’s time to pace yourself, know your limits and know how to love yourself, (that’s a post for another time).

Feeling Dry

Contrary to the title of this post, Melbourne has been rainy and wintery all week. However, I am dry and dehydrated..I have mouth ulcers in my mouth, my skin is dry and bleeding, and overall I feel unwell. But, I can’t explain why I am unwell. I feel guilty that I feel sick and so so tired.

I am feeling my zest in life is slowly fading. I feel dizzy when I play badminton…I am scared that I will injure myself once again. What are hobbies again? Everything just is hard to concentrate when I feel like I need to continue working

I am aware that I am thinking about work was too much…even on my lunch breaks and at home, I am checking my email constantly. My team leader calls me before and after work…It’s just ongoing and infiltrating my life and it is mostly my fault. I always take on too much and too often, I never learn my lesson but I love the exhilaration of being on so many committees and so many projects. But spare time is no longer mine. Maybe it’s time to take a step back and let others help.

When did I become so bad for asking for help? When did I become so independent? It must be pride, arrogance, and distrust…

Things need to change, I can’t go on like this in fear that I will crash and burn.

Attending a Live House Auction!

I cross yet another adulting milestone, attending my first live house auction!

It was so exciting and exhilarating at the same time! There was quite a crow that came to the auction, it seems like everyone think it’s a good time to buy a house…which means the prices are going to go up. It was a bit sad that I wasn’t able to make a bid at all…I have yet to recieve my Pre-approval from the bank and also the house ended up being outside my price range sadly…

The house that was being auctioned was open for half an hour before the auction to allow curious people like myself to have a walk around. This was the second time that I walked around the house, and boy this time I could see many faults that I hadn’t noticed the last time I was there. Last time I was there, the toilet was forever flushing and required a new washer or something…This time I noticed things like the fly screen on windows being broke, cracks on the floor, cracks to pipes…spider webs everywhere! And spiders! T_T. If I were to buy that property I would need to spend money to fix it up before living in it…

Anyways, more about the auction! As there were so many people, the auction had to be conducted outside in the public courtyard in the middle of all the units. An ‘Auctioneer’, or basically a dude with a rubber hammer came into the middle with a portable microphone and explained the process. He praised the property and highlighted again the things that he found was good about the property. Then he asked someone to make a starting bid of any amount…

Someone shouted, “480,000!” and then it went on…all the way until the price was going up by increments of 1000. He was trying to increase the price by $500. He then started listing out benefits of buying a house now, i.e. reduced stamp duty…and he would do the going once, going twice, several times…which gave just enough time for people to change their minds at the last minute…He kept using “Regret” and “In the grand scheme of things, what’s a few hundred?”. This was one auctioneer that was definitely on the side of the vendor who was selling their property. LOL.

When he did the very last ” GOING THREE TIMES…SOLD” He pumped his yellow hammer against the cardboard paper that he was holding..and everyone clapped, like it was a shoe or something.

Such an interesting experience! I don’t think I will be game enough to do an auction, I feel like I would be so tempted to outbid everyone, being one of those stupidly over-competitive people that you probably don’t like. I don’t like the idea of large crowds gathering in one place either, most people were wearing masks…but some people honestly do not know how to wear a mask. Wearing a mask does not mean your nose and mouth are showing….it doesn’t work if its hanging on your chin..

Anyway’s, time to get back to doing some real work..

It’s so hot today…but I am still going to play badminton :O

Melbourne Car Accidents

I just had my final probation meeting today for work, happy to say, I passed! 😍😍😍 Good to know that I am able to carry out my 2 year contract..

I can’t believe its already been 6 months since I moved to Melbourne, time flies. Feel like I’ve been here forever, yet every time I go somewhere new , it’s so exciting and fresh.

I am still looking for a place to buy.. so close yet so far away…

Also, as the title of this post alludes to, I saw two car accidents on a Friday afternoon after work. That day was a weird day, we got a whole heap of hail on the floor, making it almost look like snow! I will put a picture up! So amazing! But also, makes the roads quite slippery. It was my first time getting stuck in a highway due to the accident. It is not only painful, but also dangerous as they had to close half of the lanes ….

2021 House Hunting!

Happy New Year everyone! I can’t believe I haven’t posted ALL YEAR. How lazy of me.. XD

I just completely forgot that I haven’t blogged for awhile, I keep thinking I did…but like a lot of things in my life…I started out strong, then fizzled out, and now restarting. It’s the end result that matters right?

To say this week has been hectic is an understatement and I have slipped. back into some unhealthy habits :(.

My sleep has been so SHIT lately…I put it due to the hot weather (it is summer here), the late night HOON driving that continues to 1-2 am…I don’t even call the cops anymore as it has made ZERO difference. I just am hanging on to the hope that I will be able to move places soon. I was hanging on from moving, because I still hadn’t recieved my drivers license in the mail. LONG STORY SHORT, they never posted it…and I was waiting for over a month for it…it is only when I sent THEM an enquiry to why it was taking so long that I found out that apaprently they fcked. up my photo and didn’t even bother telling me. Apparently I have to go in there to take a photo and they are unable to give me a license without retaking my photo, EVEN THOUGH they were the ones who took my photo. Vic ROADS SUCKS. VIC POLICE SUCKS. and VIC REAL ESTATE Agents SUCK. I sound like an angry person, but I guess I am comparing this to my home town in Adelaide where I haven’t had to deal with these issues. LE SIGH.

Enough WHINGING! Anyways, in other news! It’s decided. I am planning to move in the next few months! Instead of renting this time, I am on the look out for HOUSE TO BUY. When probably can’t afford a proper house yet, but a TOWNHOUSE!! I don’t know why, but I am in love with town houses..! It just feels so quaint, cute, and comfortable to have a 2-storey house that maximises space and utilises space well. I don’t have anything against single storey units, but it’s just something about town houses that make me want to buy one…hahah the one I have my eyes set on has an asking price of $490000 to $520000…which sadly is out of my original budget…BUT hopefully fingers crossed I will be able to sort out finances prior to the auction at the end of the month. I have been talking to banks directly and bypassing the mortgage broker. It just takes TOO LONG with my mortgage broker…I am just going to do more research on my own and from what I can see, it doesn’t make much difference in terms of cost.

I feel like most things can be done on your own, but most people are probably too lazy to make the effort to do it on their own…

I am so excited to get a place!! But first have to jump the hurdle of getting a PRE-APPROVAL first…I don’t have a 20% deposit saved up yet sadly… coz I put some money into shares…and lost some money…

But the longer I rent, the more I am paying for someone else’s mortgage…

I inspected 5 properties today (I am exhausted!) but narrowed it down to 2 properties and one in particular I am hoping to buy. Both have their perks and down falls.

  1. Single story unit.

    Good: More land and garden space. Great for a dog as fenced…seems like they have a dog! As there was a dog kernel. The living room and outside space is really nice! The garage is oversized and can fit more tha one car easily! The house is in a pretty decent suburb and it is hidden at the back of a group of 6 units ((Good and bad thing). Apparently it is near a farm area, so there may be many big trucks driving stock in and out…Also not sure about hayfever?!?! It is also close to work and is safer than the other property..probably higher resell value and rental value.

    Bad: There is only one toielt an it was broken…The doors keep slamming when the windows are open. Saw some cobwebs in the window…The garage was really messy. This has a higher asking price of 50,0000 to 550000. Strata fees are around $800 a year. It can also be a bit hard to find the entrance to this house as it is at the back of a series of units…

2. Two storey town house:

Good: Newer than the single story unit and was quite well kept upon inspection. It looks great for a first house as the garden looks easy to maintain. There are just properties around the area. The BIR in both rooms look more modern and for the MAIN bedroom it has a really neat mini desk inside the WIR. It has a nice bathroom and I especially love the sink in the bathroom. The garden is really nice with a bench for entertaining outside..there was also a BBQ and a Water tank… (I am not sure if these stay if they get sold)? Two sheds and a built in clothes hanger. There are aircons in both rooms and also in the loung room. Strata was abou $300 per quarter ? or was it per year.??!?!

Bad: It is in a ‘bad suburb’ that is known for the lower SES in the past. There is not many schools nearby…There are a lot of migrants in the neighbour hood and people say that there is many burglaries in the past and that it is not safe to go out walking at night on your own. There is less space upstairs…For the same price i could possibly get a three bedroom unit in the same neighbour hood.. I need to check if there are security camers for this place…as I want to feel safe!!!!!!!!

My aunty and uncle who own a few properties already have advised me to drive down to that neighbour hood during night and during the day to see what sort of neighbours and people who live there and to check sound levels…which I will do at some stage.

Other than that, it’s back to the banks to ask if I can loan more money…

Wish me luck.

I will keep you posted!

Adulting is so tiring…after all those inspections, video chatted with aunty and uncle, then 1 hour meeting with a BANK representative… I took a 2 hour nap and ate the rest of the green ice cream for dinner. Covid cases have started up again and there was as local outbreak at the shopping centre I normally go to…so I have been trying not to do groceries there and only go to the one near my work instead…HOWEVER it means I can’t just get groceries that easily anymore :(.


Fingers crossed we will not have to do a lockdown again :(. Masks are mandatory indoors again..but TBH that never changed for me anyways as I work in a hospital.

Take care and stay safe peeps.