Credit Card Woes

I have had my credit card for less than a month..and oh BOY they really do a great job of trying to trap you to spend more than you earn. :(. I think I have spent more money in the last month than I have in this year so far…that’s terrible :(. But I guess, I try to reason with myself, these things are necessary…but are they really?

Did I really need to splurge on the newest iphone model, or could I have gotten a cheaper but older model? Did I really need to get that fancy epilator with 5 different ways to use? Did I really need to get my car serviced at TOYOTA when I could have done it way cheaper anywhere else?!!? As I think of my spending habits and question whether I am wasting money…I think it has made me rethink my choices. I understand why some people can max out their credit cards…it’s just so easy..Just pay wave this, pay wave that. You don’t see the money come out of your account straight away, so you think you can spend a bit more. It’s ADDICTIVE and you tell yourself, it’s okay…I can get points for every dollar I spend! You think about the long run about what you are saving up for. But are you really?!?! IF YOU ARE SPENDING MORE THAN YOU SAVE?

So many questions. But anyways, I have got my first statement from my credit card and I am pleased to say I have paid it off. But, this month’s bill is gonna be huge 😦 eeks.

Be careful guys, staying at home makes it so much easier to buy things online that we might not need!  Just rethink if you will regret the decision later.. >.<

re: Employment

Someone once said, “Work a job that you love and you will never have worked a day in your life”.  Or something like that. Working is an integral part of of the adult life in the current day society. Because we work, society is able to function as well as it does. While there are many benefits to working, there are some major disadvantages as well. This post will discuss both sides of this area further.

Employment is vital to an adult’s life, this is because we all know we need an income to survive and by survival, I mean having a roof over our heads, food to eat, clothes on our backs, and money to buy food and clothing. Work also provides a routine in our lives and gives our life some type of purpose while on earth and perhaps could help answer the question of “Why am I on Earth?” (or not). Having a job can also boost our self-esteem and self-confidence especially if it is something we are proud of telling others, but even if it doesn’t, at least it shows that you are earning your own income. Other additional benefits of work include the social aspects of meeting new people, working together, or talking to clients or patients. Our workplaces also allow us to learn new skills and help keeps our minds active. By working, we decrease our reliance on government handouts. For me personally, working throughout my university has always been my means to be able to travel to different places in the world. Now that I have graduated, I am working to save up for a deposit for a house. Money is a catalyst for some sort of happiness, temporary or not.

In saying that, there are some negative aspects to being in employment. In Asia specifically, where the working day tends to go into the night and there far fewer holidays, there are increased cases of people dying from overwork. One particular case was that of the death of a popular animator, Kazunori Mizuno, of the well-known series ‘Naruto’, his cause of death being overwork. The Japanese even had a word for those who die from overwork, which is ‘Karoushi’. Asides the possibility of burning out at work, the workplace environment is also a very important aspect to consider. A toxic work environment can be detrimental to your physical and mental health. Workplace bullying is one of the biggest cause of anxiety and depression. Work also takes up a lot of time in your day and hence hindering to do what you like. However, without money, there is a limit to what you can do. It’s a catch 22.

Work plays an important part in our lives and is a central part of helping society to function. It has a beneficial way to learn new skills, increase our self-esteem, and giving us a routine for our lives. Whilst there are many benefits, unfortunately, workplace bullying and burnout from overworking are some serious concerns that arise from unhealthy working conditions.

 

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Out of my comfortzone

Today marks a new day where I joined a new gym. Long story short, the all-girls exclusive gym where I had half-price membership – closed down last month 😦 After being a member there so long.. I really really do miss it :(. Unfortunately they will be moving (next year) to a different location that is not close to me anymore. Due to being busy with life, I stopped gymming for a month and just increased the days I played badminton. So instead of once a week, I played about three times a week. I mean, badminton is good and all for stamina development and cardio.. but not so much gaining a more toned body.. which I much desire.

Anyways, this is a momentous occasion, because I’ve never joined a mixed ggm before… I do admit I feel intimidated seeing the guys (and some buff girls) pumping weights heavier than me. 😦

I kinda feel like I’ve been going to a private all girls school and to a public Co-Ed school. LOL. Well, on impulse I’ve joined up for 12 months (more lols coz i wanted to live overseas next year)- guess i ll worry about the consequences of that later.

I’ve been really put out of my comfortzone lately. Flying to Sydney for a wedding in which I only basically knew the person getting married. :/ Sitting on a table in which I knew absolutely noone. Brave? Maybe. I was scared shitless though. So many things. The wonders that travelling to another city makes you do. Syndey.. is not bad actually. Could i live there? Maybe. We’ll see. So many things to do. Yet, Where do I even start?

Hmmm new gym. New job. New haircut… new..??? New instrument to pick up??

That reminds me, I’ve been watching a Chinese Drama called “Untamed”… soo good. Highly recommended if you don’t mind handsome guys, pretty girls, and lotsa action and suspense.! They feature quite a few traditional Chinese instruments and it just looks so cool and I want to learn to play the flute LOL. I swear I used to have one or two of them.. but no idea where it went ;( .

Do you guys often get that sudden inspiration to learn something after watching a show, movie, or reading a book? What inspired you?

Random Rants: Judging People

I have always thought I was pretty good at judging people…it’s not the best habit and my sister constantly scolds me for it…Tells me I should be more understanding…What if something happened to them that made them that way?

She explained to me that some people get jealous and they act out and bully people they feel they are stronger than. I asked so many times ‘Why?’ do people treat others so badly? Maybe they are judging us too?

I have started at a new site this week…what I had always dreamed of…working in Adelaide’s mental health hospital!!And boyyyy was my first few days were a bit scary. Left on my own to manage a dispensary in which I had a one-day handover with the person going on leave. Different processes, different people, different patients…It was a bit much. On top of that, there was one lady whom I had spoken to over the phone before working at another site. I had judged her to be extremely rude and patronising-even over the phone~! She was demanding things be done and belittling me. I don’t know if she remembers but I do remember her, and I just so happened to be working at the same place as her now.

I sensed there was some hostility among the group of pharmacists that were working together, there was some bickering…quarrels… We are so understaffed…it is pretty terrible and makes people unhappy. I just try to make the best of it..as someone covering I can only do so much…

But, suddenly this person yesterday…whom I had barely spoken a single word to in the past three… days..Asked me how I was going …if I was settling in? I was taken back..no one else had asked me… I am used to being thrown in the deep end and trying to swim. I asked myself, maybe she just takes some time to open up…maybe there was so much change happening that she assumed I would cause her more work and trouble?

Overall, I like it. To be absolutely honest I am terrified when I walk out to the ward to go to the staff toilet. But I tell myself, it is going to be okay. If they are allowed to walk around the ward, they should be safe! I feel so bad for being scared of them…because this is what I thought I wanted to do? To help people with mental health to get better. But, why am I so scared? I think it’s because I am so used to seeing these people behind bulletproof glass and having security around me all the time, I forget these are normal people. They all seem to have a glazed look in their eyes… of sadness, of loss, of something else. What happened to them for them to send them to a mental health hospital?

So many stories…so many things…I really do hope I can make the most of my time there and learn as much as I can to learn and grow as a pharmacist and as a person.

I am thankful that I am living the dream, even though it doesn’t feel like it. Today we had two fire alarms go off, so there were constant alarm bells ringing. We also got two phone calls from Police officers who needed the deputy director to identify some dead bodies of previous patients…there are patients lying on the ground outside.

I can finally say, “I made it to where I want to be”…But then I also realise that there is more to climb…I went through one door, but this is just opening even more doors and corridors to walk through.

 

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Random rants: Expensive​ Hobbies

I have a friend who likes loves cars…I am talking obsessed. Basically, their whole life is cars. Buying them, selling them, fixing them, cleaning, you-name-it and they are probably have done that to a car. They have their own car that they have modified to their liking and use it to go on tracks to race with. As I can imagine, it is an expensive hobby… apparently, each time they take their car on the racing (?) tracks they have to spend hundreds if not thousands to have all the tyres, brakes, and other parts of their car replaced. To me, because I do not understand why someone would waste spend so much money on such a temporary ‘in the moment’ high kinda thing.

Then I was listening to a podcast about people who collect ‘high-end shoes’. Someone on the podcast said they had around 40 pair of shoes in their collection…the thing I don’t understand is that they just buy the shoes to put on display…they don’t even wear them! That boggles my mind that you would buy something just to look at them…Each pair ranges from a few hundred dollars to a few thousand…Did you know there are such things as ‘Shoe Conventions?’

I don’t mean to belittle other people’s hobbies and interests… I guess it has made me more aware that other people have passions and interests that I might not understand. I think back to what I spend most of my money on…and it has been on travelling overseas in different countries and learning…so I guess that is my passion and to other people, it may seem like a waste of money.

What are the things you spend your time and money on?

 

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Random rants: Hectic Lives

Do you ever stop and think about how you coped with things in the past?

I sometimes wonder why I get so many migraines, headaches, and sicknesses. Then I kind of get reminded that maybe I am not eating properly, not sleeping properly, and probably doing one too many things at once.

Stress is an interesting thing and it can change over time and comes in all types of shapes and sizes.

I was reflecting back on my undergraduate university days and remembered that every day was full of things to do.

I was studying full-time, and in pharmacy we had quite a lot of contact hours…we had practicals that were 5 hours long, workshops, lectures, etc etc. It was a hectic life, on top of that I also worked two days a week in a cafe for 3 years, a retail pharmacy for one year, and in a hospital in my final year. I remembered playing in a team for the weekly badminton competition, I also remembered being captain of my very own Vets team. Then there were the religious commitments I used to have, I was in the church band, and they had weekly rehearsals on Saturdays…as well as the actual ‘performance’ days on Sundays which took up most of the day. I used to spend almost every day before a test or an exam studying at uni until well after 10 pm..to then wake up the next day at 6:30am and do it all again.

 

I remember one day, before an important test..I was studying late at night at the university..revising.. and I got a phone call. It was my mum. She said Grandmother had passed away. I was in shock. This couldn’t be happening! Not now…I just can’t deal with it…I couldn’t study any more after that. I don’t know how I managed to make myself go to that test and do so well… In hindsight, I could have applied to defer that test if I wanted to…but I didn’t.

That experience woke me up a little, it made me feel all sorts of feelings. It made me feel guilty most of all. WHY didn’t I spend more time with my grandmother when she was alive? Why did I prioritise STUDYING so much? Why did I want to do well in university when I could have just got through with average grades…Why was I so afraid of NOT doing well? Of failing? Where were my priorities? I don’t know why I worked so hard and I don’t know if it was worth it? It’s so easy to get obsessed with things for me…I was obsessed with badminton…with music…with drawing…with anime…I don’t know. Passion? Entertainment? I don’t know. Honestly…now  I am probably just obsessed with working and getting money. For what? Do I think a house or holiday will make me happy? Maybe. Maybe for a little bit. But then what, I’ll be sad again?

I have to constantly remind myself, life is short. We don’t know when our end is. What will we regret when we are older that we wished we did more?

I ask myself this because there are many decisions we have to make. There are many pathways we could go…but it all takes risks…There are some many “I WISHES” and hopefully we can get to them before it is ‘Too late’ and anyways I am not even sure where this post is going anymore…

 

 

 

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A clear room and a clear mind

I have finished tidying up my room! It took a good solid two weeks of tidying and cleaning, but it is DONE!

Do you know what benefits I have had in cleaning my room?

  1. I killed a spider
  2. I found about $25 of money in red packets and in loose change in my piggy bank!
  3. Found a lot of foreign currency I didn’t know I had! -$$ unknown
  4. Discovered socks and clothes that I didn’t even know I had.
  5. I can now pull out something from the hangers in my wardrobe without pulling out five others at the same time.
  6. I know where everything is! Because I basically went through everything!
  7. Less dust! As I finally cleaned the surfaces that had stuff on it for ages.
  8. I donated at least 10 bags of items to charity – benefit for society? HAhaha
  9. Found lots of photos, sticker photos and things from friends that I have stuck around my room – the colour really brightens up the place 🙂
  10. Everything just feels more organised! I love opening up a draw or a door and seeing everything I own at once.I have officially joined the Marie Kondo Kult- I am a life member now… Let me show you some before and after photos!

 

.These are the before photos…60154824_2368153593514804_1840298142356996096_n

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^I had over 140 coat hangers…I am so surprised I even have that many clothes to hang!!

After the 2 week cleaning spritz..

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And that’s a wrap on my cleaning spritz…and now let’s hope my mind gets cleared too. 🙂

I learnt a lot about learning to let go of things that have passed its expiry date…About things you have to let go in order to move on to better things..as Kondo says, how can you appreciate what “Sparks Joy” if you have too many things to look after?

Change will be coming soon!

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Good intentions

Over the last few days…I have been thinking about blog posts that I could write about..ideas that might sound good…and then …I did NOT write them down and now I have forgotten them 😦

Like all things in life, if we do not take grasp of something tightly enough, it will slip from our hands easily…

For example, when I am stressed..I tend to snack more..I don’t eat more food…I just LOVE snacking…whether its nuts, pretzels (yumm), chips…you name it and I probably have eaten it. It is an extremely unhealthy habit of mine….I just stock up and hoard a WHOLE lot of junk food…some which turns out to taste bad…yet I force myself to eat it..because I bought it already you know…so yeah no doubt about it….feed yourself unhealthy things and you become unhealthy!!

Cue the never ending headaches…the pimples :(..the bad sleep…the poor immune system… sads… but yeah but my point is…we have to be careful what we put in our mouths..or our heads… if we think to ourselves we *need* that coffee to survive…that snack to study…then we feed ourselves lies. Because, we can prove ourselves wrong…maybe not on the first, second or even twelfth time…but we can do it ..because with all addictions we started off not being addicted…

It’s sad how addiction has been so closely linked to bad things…I wish more often that I would be addicted to doing good…or being nice…But like all things even doing good should be in moderation…coz if you are so generous you gave away all your money…then ..that’s just a poor decision.

Anyways, I have to stop my procrastination …5 more days to D-Day.. 😮

Tortoise and the Hare

At the gym I go to, they were still open 24/7 over the Christmas/New Period but they stopped running the live classes…

This was a real struggle for me … as I force myself o go to the gym for those classes… so I really had no incentive to go…so I went like once a week.. and that’s mainly coz I am cheap and I hated seeing my membership fees being deducted from my bank account and realising they are getting free money…

Anyways, what I am trying to say is… I normally do not do weights and cardio work out by myself… I am someone highly motivated by having people around me working hard…hence love those classes…!

So I went to the gym twice over the holiday period.. On the first visit..I went on the treadmill… I was like .. hmmm this sure looks like a good way to get my 10,000 steps on my fitbit..!! So I started off slow 4.5km/hour speed.. up to 8.0km/h (not fast I know)… did that for about a minute or so (seriously out of breath…unfit 😦 ) and them took a bit of a break by slowing down to 4.5 km/h just to get recover my breath… coz tired..!! I did this for 20minutes… and was super tired.. I managed to do 2km distance in that 20minutes! Not bad..? For me 😂

On the second visit.. I was feeling really lethargic of late ( prob due to iron deficiency).. and I decided I wouldn’t do those speed intervals because the sprinting really takes the wind out of me… but I also hate walking really slow on the treadmill😭 I am a pretty fast walker…probably due to the fact I work in a lot of faced-paced environments where I cannot walk slow :(.. so I set it at a constant speed of 6.5km/hour.. so mid way between what I did in my first visit…

And it was great .. I didn’t have to constantly look at the little time and have to keep changing the speeds on the right up and down.. and I didn’t feel as exhausted and worn out at the end of 10 minutes.. And I did the same…! At the end .. I got the same result. 1km/10 minutes essentially!

But this way.. was better..easier and didn’t tire me out…

it was interesting how I feel like that can relate to me and how I have been living my life… I go through periods of extreme stress .. leading to anxiety, depression and mental breakdowns…to a point where I can’t take it amy more.. then I am forced to rest… my body shuts down in sickness .. and thats when I recover.. start to remember my health and my sanity again…

The reason why I’ve been working so hard for the last six months with no break (literally working 7 days a week for I am not sure how many weeks it is now)… is because I felt I was so behind in life… in comparison to my friends… those my age are getting married, have moved overseas to work… buying houses.. doing all this exciting stuff and what I feel is “adult” stuff.. and there was me… who blew my savings recklessly on an expensive holiday overseas… and on some scam medicine entrance exam course….I felt I needed to catchup by working myself to almost death -? Because I am so tired all the time, worn out… burnt out… sick so often and can’t even relax…get irritable… can’t eat properly.. don’t have time or energy to see friends…

I am asking myself..? Why do I meed to do all this sprinting to try catch up to everyone else? I am just going o get exhausted and need a really good rest-where I might have to stop work altogether for s break… because if I am constant with myself.. mot too much.. not too little.., I can reach that end goal without over exerting myself.. and still enjoy a good work out that is life…

Thanks for reading my weird analogies o life.. i literally wrote this at 4am because I woke up with blood running down my face from my nose… oops

Stay Joyful guys!

The art of lying

Have you ever thought why do people lie?

Why can’t they tell the truth?

Aren’t they worried that the truth will come out?

As someone that was brought up being taught ..sinning is bad! You will go to hell=…if you lie! If you look at someone lustfully ..You’ve already committed adultery! If you speak bad about one person..you are going to be in hell. No swearing..no rebelling. Live your life as if you were for Christ. etc etc.

I was shit scared to sin. I refrained myself from swearing, though I would swear in my head. I would pretend I was an angel, when I was not behind closed doors. I was busy putting on a mask, a face that said everything is good, everything is fine. I didn’t even realise what a lie my life had become.

Why do we lie?

Is it because facing reality is just too damn hard?

If we face reality, we realise that life is so damn unpredictable.

Maybe we unintentionally lie. We say things we don’t mean. We aim to be polite.

In the heat of the moment, two lovers promise each other that they will love the other forever.

One year later, one finds out the other lied. Because they left them. All alone.

People are fickle. Whether we intentionally lie with a purpose or not even being aware of it.

Humans were born as liars. No one taught us how to lie. It is our innate nature to deceive and perhaps it was due to evolution.

Maybe, telling a lie has saved someones life in the past and hence humans have evolutionalised to become the liars that they are today,

 

Look at our world leaders, politicians, famous actors or singers. They all have made and told great lies and deceived many.

But then again, who hasn’t ever told a lie?

Well obviously, I haven’t.  😉

The secret Addictions nobody mentions

When you think of the word addiction what comes to mind?

Do you automatically think of those who are drug addicts, alcoholics, smokers, gamblers or even sex addicts?

But what about those more..subtle addictions, which gnaw away your life the same way, yet unnoticed and untreated…not recognised… no support..because you can’t be the same as them. 

 

We like to separate us and them whether that is to make us feel better or just to trick ourselves into denial…that there is nothing wrong with…

Playing too many video games…the game addict…

Taking multiple selfies a day and posting it on social media..facebook..instagram..snap chat…social media addict

Doing nothing but study everyday and all day….the study addict

Working non-stop for weeks on end without a single break in between… the workaholic

There is so many addictions out there..I can’t even think of the name of it?

 

What we fail to realise is that these unrecognised addictions can slowly ebb and destroy our lives…our careers..our health…our friendships and our sanity.

Those who stay cooped up in their rooms all day may not have many friends…poor hygiene…most likely low vitamin d levels from staying indoors all days…back problems..eye problems…Life is more than a game. Open your eyes and see the real world around you that you have neglected.

Those who are ‘addicted’ to their phones…they don’t realise there are people in front of them. Everything is about taking the perfect photos…the selfies…they don’t care about living in the moment, but just how the moment  looks in a photo. It gives them a false sense of security..that I have friends..that I look pretty…that I need to show the world that I am happy, successful and beautiful. But inside we are empty and alone. It stems from our insecurity and it can become an addiction hard to break…as peers pressure peers to join them in their addiction. How many of us can resist not looking at our phone multiple times a day? It’s hard to imagine how life was like before we all got mobile phones…

Those who do nothing but study all day are similar..people think that this is okay..this is better than then playing games all day~ but they never develop any social skills..they cannot fare well in the real world…when they finally realise that they need to work with others..they do not know how… social life? What’s that? Then those in Asia who have been pressured by tiger parents to do well…school..cram school..home work…wake up and repeat. Is that living? Life is more than just study and the pressure that has mounted to kids have led many students to take their lives in Japan and China.

Then there are those who grow up and then become addicted to working. That can’t be bad right? What is so bad about being hard-working? Isn’t that what we strive for? If you look at countries like Japan, the working population are working 12 hour days, 6 or 7 days a week. This has led to a decrease in in birth rates and the population is growing smaller and smaller as who has time to look after kids, have babies when working such long hours? It seems like no one even has time to date! People aren’t happier when they are stressed. Over working comes at a price, the animator for the popular series Naruto Kazunori Mizuno was found to have died from over work.  The Japanese even have a name for deaths from overwork, it’s just that common, this word is karoshi and it characterises death that is from stress, heart attack and a starvation diet. 

 

 Have a think about what you could be addicted to and not even realise…