Do as I say but not as I do

You’ve heard that statement, practice what you preach.

But how many leaders actually follow their own advice?

I mean I understand nobody is perfect 100% of the time.

But, doesn’t it suck if you have a leader who likes to tell others what to do, except won’t follow their own advice?

It is like they are immune to the rules of the company.

Hypocritical describes it I suppose.

There are no perfect leaders, but some are better than others…who work harder than they need to.

And some who you don’t want to listen to what they say or do, like Mr Trump.

The end of a chapter and the start of the next

The cogs of change are changing again and life as I had known it for the last 9 months , funny how it started as a 4 week gig. When did it change? When did I stop caring, stop striving, and lost my focus?

I think I did bring it upon myself…too scared to let go of what is safe and what is familiar and immerse myself into the unknown. I am not sure if that is partly the reason why I find myself in this predicament. But then ironically, I prove myself right. It didn’t work out, but at least I have a some form of security in knowing that I have the second job while looking for something new.

It’s scary. Not knowing what my future will be like. But hey, this has been happening every few months before a contract ends. I still remember the terror and anxiety I felt when my first contract was almost ending…I was worried did I make a good impression? I’ve always worked hard and did my best to be nice to everyone. But I guess when you so hard and with no recognition, you start feeling under appreciated, tired, stressed, and burdened. Too scared to complain because you want to be chosen to stay there, yet everyday feels harder than the day before.

This good bye was inevitable. There are regrets, but there are also moments where I had a confidence that I did not have before and I am proud that this difficult situation developed that in me. Standing up for my rights and of others is something that I strive to do. I think it has something to do with respecting yourself and speaking up when something things off or wrong. Working in a mental health institution has always been a goal of mine and I have fulfilled that and believe this was be a stepping stone into something greater.

Apparently, with this company there will be an exit interview…this is not something I have done before, despite working in so many places previously. There is so many things I want to say, but I need to be careful of saying anything too bad,  because I need this people to be referees. There is never a way to win is there? Better to leave on good times than bad. I am both scared, yet also looking forward to a change of scenery. Bring on the last 3 weeks of full time work…

Stay Tuned for updates

The Breaking Point

I think we all have a limit.

A point where just one small thing can put you over the edge.

Something small that usually wouldn’t bother you.

But you have had enough.

I think you know it’s happening, even when you try to convince yourself everything is okay.

People think you are fine when you are barely holding yourself together.

You try to brush it away, pretend it is not real…BUT IT IS there and it eats away like you like an internal parasite.

The parasite is eating away at your and slowly it takes over your whole body.

Slowly you become an empty shell…Where you feel nothing, care about nothing, and do things you didn’t care about.

It’s a ticking timebomb and someday…you are gonna explode.

Then you will know.

It’s too late.

You’ve reached your breaking point.

Random Rants: Reporting your colleagues

Today was a tough day. So many challenges, upsets, and unexpected upsets…

In the past, I think I have wrote about how in my line of work I face people that have issues with drug and alcohol withdrawal. They are rude, aggressive, and partly I know the reason why they act that way. However, when today I was faced with a rude and difficult staff member, I was flabbergasted. There are times when I want to throw in the towel, give up, and swear at everyone and storm out, but do I do it? No. Because I want to keep my job and in the Chinese way we describe it “Save our face” (or dignity). As I said in my post about being a ‘Professional‘…

But wow. There was a staff member who lost it. Literally lost it. I don’t work directly with her, but I first talked to her on the phone, let’s call her “X”. She called up asking about whether some “trial leave” medications were ready. I said, well has anyone dropped off the script to pharmacy? She was shocked that a doctor actually had to write a script …I wasn’t rude to her at all, but I was explaining what is the normal procedure for a trial leave. The doctor SHOULD write the script based on how many days the patient will go on leave, they indicate when the leave will take place, and if there is no clinical pharmacist in that ward, then we ask for the medication charts so I reconcile the script to the chart. In this case it was also a Webster pack, so it was crucial to have those drug charts. She asked when it would done, as we hadn’t even got the script I said around an hour…and normally we need 24 hours notice normally for Webster packs and they wanted one on the spot. RUDE. Then she said she was going to put an incident report in…I was like…Are you going to put one in for us? Because this is not our fault that you guys didn’t organise this trial leave at an earlier date… and she said, she was going to write a report reporting everyone involved apparently. Whatever floats your boat mate.

In this case, the doctor wrote the script as a discharge script. He wrote one months worth of all the medications out and did not specify whether it was for leave or for discharge. I tried calling the number he listed on the script, and got no answer. I called the ward to clarify how many days the patient was going on leave and whether or not it was actually a discharge, because occasionally we do one week’s Webster pack (Which is a 7 dose pack that we make up so the patient can punch out their meds easily) and give the rest of the medications on discharge.  This will change how much the patient has to pay and if they have to pay. If it is leave medication, they don’t get charged anything for any of the medications or the packs. If it is discharge meds, the patient will have to pay the full cost of all the medications plus a $6.60 Webster packing fee. If the doctor just wants the patient to only have one week Webster pack, we don’t charge anything for the medications in the pack and just charge $6.60 for the Webster packing fee. As you can seem ,this is important to know as it will affect how much medication is dispensed and who is paying the cost. The person I called on the phone didn’t seem to understand this and I could hear that person “X”, swearing at us in the background, saying “Why can’t they just do their EFFINGJOB”. I was like. … WOW…so I politely asked the person on the phone, “Who is that in the background?”. She said, “Oh I don’t know their name, they are just passing by”. Obviously lies as she put me on hold while the rant in the background continued. I just want to do my job, you shouting and insulting us in the background. Does not help. Not one bit.

Anyways, I told my boss about what I heard on the phone…and she said she would send an email to someone high up and tell them that’s not how you can treat pharmacy staff. Thank you to those in higher positions than mine. I am just a small potatoe that gets bossed around.

About a half an hour later when the managers spoke to one another. The staff member X, whose name I did not know came and asked if there was a “Josie” around. I said, “We don’t have a Josie, but my name is Joy”. Hastily, she said, “I came to apologise for my behaviour earlier, I was stressed out from work.” I said that’s fine, but “what is your name?”  Because I have no idea who she is, she then says “My name is Donna, but don’t worry I have already been reported”, then she stormed out. That was the best apology ever. NOT. Obviously someone told her that she had to come apologise.

I normally wouldn’t stoop that low to do an incident report on a staff member, but my boss did. The politics at work are insane. We work in a mental health facility, but I feel like half the staff should also be patients there. The world is a crazy messy place.

I have dealt with some difficult situations before, but this was really new to me…how can you treat other health professionals in this way?  That’s beyond me.

Well I just had to rant this one out…because I keep lamenting and thinking about it…but I really need to get on with that assignment due next week .. T_T…Wish me luck..and someone remind me why I decided to work two jobs and study part-time too?!?

re: Employment

Someone once said, “Work a job that you love and you will never have worked a day in your life”.  Or something like that. Working is an integral part of of the adult life in the current day society. Because we work, society is able to function as well as it does. While there are many benefits to working, there are some major disadvantages as well. This post will discuss both sides of this area further.

Employment is vital to an adult’s life, this is because we all know we need an income to survive and by survival, I mean having a roof over our heads, food to eat, clothes on our backs, and money to buy food and clothing. Work also provides a routine in our lives and gives our life some type of purpose while on earth and perhaps could help answer the question of “Why am I on Earth?” (or not). Having a job can also boost our self-esteem and self-confidence especially if it is something we are proud of telling others, but even if it doesn’t, at least it shows that you are earning your own income. Other additional benefits of work include the social aspects of meeting new people, working together, or talking to clients or patients. Our workplaces also allow us to learn new skills and help keeps our minds active. By working, we decrease our reliance on government handouts. For me personally, working throughout my university has always been my means to be able to travel to different places in the world. Now that I have graduated, I am working to save up for a deposit for a house. Money is a catalyst for some sort of happiness, temporary or not.

In saying that, there are some negative aspects to being in employment. In Asia specifically, where the working day tends to go into the night and there far fewer holidays, there are increased cases of people dying from overwork. One particular case was that of the death of a popular animator, Kazunori Mizuno, of the well-known series ‘Naruto’, his cause of death being overwork. The Japanese even had a word for those who die from overwork, which is ‘Karoushi’. Asides the possibility of burning out at work, the workplace environment is also a very important aspect to consider. A toxic work environment can be detrimental to your physical and mental health. Workplace bullying is one of the biggest cause of anxiety and depression. Work also takes up a lot of time in your day and hence hindering to do what you like. However, without money, there is a limit to what you can do. It’s a catch 22.

Work plays an important part in our lives and is a central part of helping society to function. It has a beneficial way to learn new skills, increase our self-esteem, and giving us a routine for our lives. Whilst there are many benefits, unfortunately, workplace bullying and burnout from overworking are some serious concerns that arise from unhealthy working conditions.

 

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Random Rant: On Forgiveness

Forgiveness…it’s hard to describe exactly what it is.

It’s something that I heard a lot when I used to attend church.

“God forgave your sins so you should forgive other people”. I took this literally, people treated me like shit, I took it. I decided to try “see the best in them” and let them do it again and again. I don’t think I really understood that there is a difference between forgiving someone and letting someone step all over you.

I have learnt that forgiveness does not mean forgetting or condoning the wrongdoing, or reconciling a relationship, we are able to forgive and never say a word to them ever again. In the same way, we could say the words “I forgive you” or “I accept your apology”, and actually forgive them.

Forgiveness instead is an emotional change that happens inside someone who has been wronged. Forgiveness is not for the wrongdoer, it is actually for the person that has been wronged. I think this is what many of us get confused about. Forgiveness is not a gift for the other person it is a gift FOR YOURSELF, it allows us to overcome the pain that is inflicted by someone else. This is a process of letting go of our anger, resentment, shame and other emotions towards the other person or even towards ourselves.

It also treats the offender with compassion, even though they are not entitled to it.

I don’t understand forgiveness, but I hope I can slowly understand it someday.

The World of Work

I think, innately everyone desires to have a nice work place..A place where you look forward to seeing your colleagues, a place with nice patients/clients and a place where you feel safe.

When one or more of these things are not there, it can make it a very depressing and difficult time…especially if you work and spend extended periods of time in the same place with the same people.

Difficult Colleagues:

I’ve noticed when there is someone I don’t like at work, I do my best to avoid them. I know, I know it doesn’t solve all the issues. But, if I can run away from confrontation I will..try my best… to run away…

In the end, it doesn’t really matter (cue Linkin Park sound track)…very rarely does it solve the problem…but by being more confident, by standing up for yourself and doing something about it…things can change. Well, I least I do hope so.

Difficult Clients:

I’ve worked/working in a few workplaces that deal with extremely difficult clients, whether drug seekers, criminals or just mentally disturbed…it can be hard! I’ve had to call the police a few times, threaten to and just been scared for my life. I get it, it can be hard and sometimes you wonder…is it worth it? Feeling scared all the time going into work…to get mentally, physically or emotionally abused by clients?

I hate retail. You feel like you have to constantly suck up to your customers or they wont buy your stuff! You have to please them and they can kick a fuss about absolutely anything and I hate that word “The customer is always right”. Because they are not.

Unsafe Workplace:

Unsafe work places are just hazards just waiting to occur…This could be unsafe because of the machinery/equipment at work…like having boiling water all around  you…carrying steaming hot hotpots… or slicing numerous amounts of meats with a dull blade. Unsafe work places can’t be happy places… 😦 If people are constantly getting injured or being affected by the toxic (literally) unsafe work place, it can’t be a very happy place to work in in my opinion.

 

Good workplaces can be a extremely hard thing find, so if you do find one, stick to it!

Otherwise, start your own business and work for yourself 😉