Don’t try to Fix Me

Have you ever wished that you could take away someone’s sadness…anger issues..bad habits?

Have you, despite knowing you can’t change them- gotten angry, frustrated, and upset that despite all your immense efforts and hard work – they don’t change…or they change for a bit-then they go straight back to their old habits.

Why do we do that? Why do we try change people?

Sometimes our intentions may be good ones..we just want the best for them…you can see that they are acting toxic towards themselves or others…and you think alright…just need to change them…

But, as you might have realised..it’s incredibly hard to change someone, who doesn’t want to or understand why they need to change. If the self-determination isn’t there, they won’t be able to change…They will just continue thinking what they are doing is right. Unless they can see clearly why they need to change their behaviour…telling them… yelling at them…incenticising them will only lead so far 😦

 

Click here Support me to write a book !! 

Comparisons

Comparisons. Unfortunately, we all do it. Whether or not its intentional or it just happens. It’s hard to avoid, but it can be toxic as.

We compare ourselves in an attempt for us to supposedly feel better.

At least I am not as evil as her!

At least I didn’t make the same mistake as them

At least I am better than them.

We also do it to make ourselves worse…

Why wasn’t I chosen for the new position? I thought I was as good as they were.

If only I was taller, smarter, prettier, richer, popular… as them

How come they get that and I don’t…I wish I was more like them.

Not great examples..but I hope you get my point. In a round about way, and as most motivational self-help hippy guidebooks would probably say…

Just compare yourself to who you were before.

But I mean it doesn’t always work…What if you were fatter now than before? What if you were pretty and then something happened and you aren’t considered pretty anymore?

 

I am not even sure what this post was even supposed to be about. Some sort of ramble about comparing yourself to others being bad. I think we should try avoid it as much as we can. Just sort of see it as, oh okay…I didn’t get the promotion…maybe I am meant to do something else…or perhaps it’s a sign I should look for a new job…if they seem to be overlooking me… I am determined to finish this post on a slightly positive note…

If one door closes, then another is probably about to open…we just have to stop focusing on the closed door…and realise it may have have to be closed to open the way for new opportunities.

Three days to D-Day ….. ;o

On Work Ethics

Disclaimer: I am no model employee, but I do make some observations while at the workplace

I’ve worked in a fair few workplaces over the years…while at University and after graduating.

I observe there are a few types of people out there.and to put them into three super broad categories.

  1. Some who genuinely seem to love their job and gives it their best (rare) 
  2. Those who may not love their job, but still gives it their best (also not that common) 
  3. Those who clearly hate their job and do NOT do their best and clearly don’t care less about their job…but most likely they have been in the job so long that they won’t get fired.

 

  1. Some who genuinely seem to love their job and gives it their best 

Haven’t met so many of these…but they do exist! These types of people are great to work with…they teach you so much, they make work fun and you can tell they like coming to work. They exuberant positive energy and bring kindness wherever they go. They seek to make lives better for other people…whether that’s by being friendly, kind and possibly bringing snacks to share with others to work. I used to try to aim to be this type of person, but I think I’ve started to burn out/wear out over time with dealing with difficult colleagues.

 

2. Those who may not love their job, but still gives it their best  

I would classify myself as this. I don’t hate my job (most of the time), but I do believe I should give it my best…because at the end of the day…they are paying me to be there. They are paying me for my time!~ I don’t want to get fired or set bad examples for other people to follow. I try to get to work early, be organised and try to make sure I leave the workplace in a neat orderly state for whoever is there tomorrow. I think most people fit into this category…

 

3. Those who clearly hate their job and do NOT do their best and clearly don’t care less about their job…but most likely they have been in the job so long that they won’t get fired.

Aside from the bullies, these group of people are the hardest for me to work with. They exuberant negative energy that makes it clear that they don’t want to be there. They arrive late and have a tirade of excuses and reasons why they are late…Usually it is different excuses, but sometimes they get creative. They clearly don’t care about their job and do only the bare minimum to get by. They are not productive at work, they look at the time and only start working at the set time (if they are even there on time). They make people in groups 1 and 2 exasperated because of their lack of willingness to work hard…and it’s tiring being around these people. You know they don’t want to be there, so why are you here? No one is forcing you. Go do something you want to do, or at least do something to make your way there…

 

What type are you? What type would you like to be?