Are you dwelling or planning?

I spend a lot of time worrying and then making myself anxious about the things that are yet to come…Anyone here know that feeling when something worries you…and it starts off small..but as you have more time…you start to ponder..you add to it..and what started off as maybe a small problem has snowballed into a massive one. Then you can’t sleep…can’t eat…can’t enjoy life anymore without thinking of that massive problem…

So basically you’ve just created a MONSTER.. a Frankenstein if you must and now he’s out to destroy your life. 😦

I am also a person who likes to plan things in advance. I like lot’s of notice…who, exact time, where, when and roughly how much. Spontaneous things don’t work out well for me. I don’t like the uncertainty and the things that I can’t prepare for…

I thought it was fine to keep thinking and planning my future….I thought by thinking about it more it would get better or suddenly a solution would pop out of no where and answer all my unanswered questions. It was only today that someone asked me, “Are you planning or dwelling?”. Planning can be useful; for example if you need to plan your strategy for getting a new job. Planning helps you to use your time more efficiently int he job search…which websites you will look at, what expos can you go to, who do you know who can help you make an connection…

But, dwelling is different…Is it not good to keep thinking thoughts like… “What if I don’t get a job?”…”What if no one wants to hire me?”…”What if my resume is rubbish and I get no interviews?” …I hope you get my point. So in this case, dwelling is of no use of all and it probably hinders your progress in finding a job…because you waste so much time thinking over and over what could happen, what if you did things different, what if you could just turn back time…

There’s no use. We can’t turn back time…We can’t control what happens in the future. If it was meant to be, it will be.

What’s important is that we live in the present … We remember that while it’s okay to plan…we also acknowledge that things don’t always go to plan and that’s okay…Maybe it was meant to happen that way for a reason. ..

 

❤ ❤ <# Click here Support me to write a book !!  ❤ ❤ ❤

The art of looking good: Guys VS Women

I was getting ready this morning …and it occurred to me, I feel like I spend a lot of effort when meeting people…

For girls:

  1. The shower to be clean and have freshly washed hair.
  2. Blow drying hair and adding copious amount of leave in conditioner and also add moisturiser and lotion to face
  3. Taking a large amount of time to try decide what to wear…factors that need to be considered is the weather…what I am going to do…Do I need pockets today?! What shoes will I wear…
  4. Then it’s time to paint your face, smile, eye brows and lips on.
  5. Then it’s time to straighten out your hideous hair which can take a loaning time when its stubborn. Then style with hair gels.
  6. Then need to choose hand bag and other accessories…such as necklaces? Watch? Lipbalm in bag?
  7. Then revaluate everything and check if you need to change anything.
  8. Spray some deodorant or perfume!

    For guys:

    1.Wake up
    2.Shower
    3. Wears the first clothes that the see in the morning and they only have one pair of shoes to go out with.

    Done!

    It’s weird…when I see a guy has showered. I feel like that’s already a lot of effort…But then in comparison, doesn’t the girl make wayyyy more effort?
    Why is life so unfair?

BUT then again, I guess there is slightly more expectations that a guy should look a certain way. Society seems to have an obsession with masculinity that I don’t really understand… Guys like to have big muscles and they especially love showing off them gym photos. Weird Flex to me! If they are small, they feel self-conscious of it and try to hide their insecurity by pretending they don’t care…

 

I guess society has different expectations of the gold standards for women and men…Women need to pretty, petite and sexy…and men need to be masculine, tall, and handsome.

Too bad real life isn’t always gold standard

..Happy Easter!!

 

❤ ❤ <# Click here Support me to write a book !!  ❤ ❤ ❤

Would you rather? *Random Rants*

Have you ever thought why players like to be players? As in those who don’t want to commit to one person in a relationship and like to see new people all the time?

I believe I am an optimistic pessimist…if that exists ..I can see the good AND the bad things in every situation..

SO in this particular scenario..

A player gets the thrills of 100 first dates…gets excited for meeting the girl/boy for the first time…excitement of finding out about this new girl/boy. It’s exciting when you do everything for the first time. You go to exciting new restaurants, see movies, try something you never have done before…you learn a lot of things from these 100 first dates from 100 people. The downfall is, that you fall in love easily-and get your heart broken easily. There is no one that’s going to stay by your side..because it’s always changing…You don’t have deep and meaningful connections…

or…

Alternatively would you rather have 100 mediocre dates with the same person? Perhaps  you like this person…or perhaps you are just tolerating them..because you’ve been together for so long already.. Maybe your dates have gotten boring…or maybe you don’t even go out anymore…it’s just Netflix and chill all day everyday. Sure, you’ve found stability, loyalty ..but won’t you get tired of the seeing the same person day in and day out?

 

What would you prefer if you had a choice?

 

❤ ❤ <# Click here Support me to write a book !!  ❤ ❤ ❤

What’s in a name?

I’ve been thinking lately (what else is new?)- about the power of a name..

There are so many uses for a name! People associate themselves with names, land marks and buildings have names, countries have names, and also illnesses have names.

Flowing on from the last post about introductions, I wonder…can you know someone without knowing their name? Like why does it matter what their name is? Yet, it DOES matter in terms of having an identity that you are who you are. If we didn’t have names, would we just be described by our behaviours or how we physically look like? That blind man over there…That fat old lady sitting there…I guess we may that to an extent if we didn’t know their names…

It’s really amazing the stereotypes that we associate with certain things..be it a gender.. “I am a boy, so I should be strong, I should not cry!”…”I am a girl, so I should know how to cook and clean!”. It could be a race, “I am Chinese, so I should be ashamed about the fact I do not know how to use chopsticks properly!”. Sometimes I feel like, due to all the names and labels that are put on us, we feel like we have to be or act a certain way to fulfil other people’s expectations of us. It’s like a self-fulfilling prophecy. You think you should act a certain way, therefore you act that way…and then you think it is because I thought I had to act that way so I did, or did I naturally want to do it? I hope you understand what I mean.

So, in particular I want to highlight why naming has such a big level of influence on someone ‘diagnosed’ with a mental illness. I will explain shortly why I put diagnosed in quotation marks. If you haven’t heard of the DSM, you can check out this link here basically it is a bible of all the known mental illnesses of mankind at this point of time. It is always changing, things are added and things are taken out. For example, homosexuality used to be in the DSM, until people rallied to have it taken out. I imagine it would be a terrible time to live in if you were homosexual…if you revealed to a doctor you had homosexual tendencies…you would be subject to various, often painful, treatments in order to ‘cure’ you and make you ‘normal’ or heterosexual.  Sadly, often these treatments did not work and caused terrible trauma and pain upon those individuals.

The DSM started off as a small thin book and throughout the years it has been continually added to…there are more entries going in than out..it’s now a huge book. So, it causes us to ask the question, “Are we just putting labels on normal human behaviours?“. So basically everyone has mental illness. If we are all mentally ill, then what right do we have to called others ‘Crazy, Pyscho, and Insane?”

But my point is, are we really helping people on their road to recovery by sticking numerous labels on people?

I remember a time when I went to see a doctor about a problem… she initially diagnosed it as “XX” condition…then later she changed her mind and said it was “YY”. Did any of these labels help me to get back on my feet? The answer is N-O. It did nothing, except perhaps make me even more paranoid. I looked up Dr Google and looked up all the symptoms and things that people diagnosed with “YY” had…I went to forums and read how people’s lives seemed to be affected by having “YY”… I was confused, scared, and my anxiety was through the roof. I felt like I had a life sentence upon me, just because of the subjective, narrow-minded opinions of one individual who was useful for nothing except chucking labels. Like a self-fulfilling prophecy, I doubted my self to be normal and got self-conscious of every action that I did, did I do it because I have “YY” condition? Was I going to turn out like everyone else that presumably have “YY” condition..

I am so glad now, I left that doctor after realising how toxic visiting her was… I see a different doctor who does not just throw labels around. She genuinely wants to understand what I am going through and why I am going through those things…It’s not a matter of throwing my labels upon a person…it is trying to understand what they are going through and helping them explore options to why they feel that way. The first doctor had created a large chasm between me and her, she had elevated herself to be the ‘expert’ and I was just a ‘passive clueless’ receiver. Because I listed out a few symptoms that fit into the definition particular condition, she deemed I had it…it didn’t matter  that there were exceptions to the rule, that I had strengths and characteristics not associated with that condition…it was because she used her subjective, stereotypical view and saw me as ‘abnormal’ and I needed to be ‘fixed’. She made it clear something was wrong with me and that I needed to change, she gave the impression she was normal. Now I think back, she was nothing but an evil witch. She didn’t want people to get better, she just wanted herself to feel better about herself by chucking labels on everyone.

I am not saying labelling a condition is not useful for anything…certainly if you want to have mental health sessions subsidised by the government you have to be categorised into having a diagnosis of some sort…the same is needed for insurance company claims etc…but if you are trying to help someone, it is not useful for helping them in their recovery by focussing on their deficits and not their strengths.

I have been meaning to write about this topic for some time now, but put it off.. because I am not sure if I can do it justice..

I would be super interested in hearing your thoughts about this!

 

<3 <3 <# Click here Support me to write a book !!  <3 <3 <3

The Art of introducing yourself

I read in an article somewhere about how introduce yourself to others in a way that they would remember…and basically it made me question myself and my interactions with people that I have not met before.

Why do we like to assign people to certain occupations and things that they predominantly do to contribute to society, be it a student, teacher, or doctor. Does knowing someone’s occupation really help us to get to know someone better? Or does it help us categorise that person into a certain category..? I.e. They are librarian-they must be a nerd, engineer they must be good at numbers…chefs- hopefully good at cooking!?!

Should we change the question from”What do you do for a living?” To “What makes you feel alive?”

What if you weren’t working? There was a period of time where I took a break from work and study.. and I super avoided meeting new people.. coz then I would have to tell them how I wasn’t studying or working.. and they would be like so what do you do with your time? And in that case you talk about your hobbies, interests, sports etc. But in a way, you are also made to feel somewhat inferior or embarrassed that you may seen as “not contributing to society”.

People choose to spend their time differently and sometimes you may feel tempted to judge or criticise their time, as I do… but hey just cause you don’t think someone gaming 13 hours a day is being productive, you don’t know… maybe they will be a game changer in the future..? Maybe?

 

Click here Support me to write a book !!  

Don’t try to Fix Me

Have you ever wished that you could take away someone’s sadness…anger issues..bad habits?

Have you, despite knowing you can’t change them- gotten angry, frustrated, and upset that despite all your immense efforts and hard work – they don’t change…or they change for a bit-then they go straight back to their old habits.

Why do we do that? Why do we try change people?

Sometimes our intentions may be good ones..we just want the best for them…you can see that they are acting toxic towards themselves or others…and you think alright…just need to change them…

But, as you might have realised..it’s incredibly hard to change someone, who doesn’t want to or understand why they need to change. If the self-determination isn’t there, they won’t be able to change…They will just continue thinking what they are doing is right. Unless they can see clearly why they need to change their behaviour…telling them… yelling at them…incenticising them will only lead so far 😦

 

Click here Support me to write a book !! 

Work Vs Leisure

Sooo I tried for the first time the Lime-S Scooters that are on almost every corner of the city centre…for those who might not know how they look like..it looks like this:

lime-scooter-lineup-3-1220x813.jpg

These some what stylish scooters have been seen everywhere….in the streets, on the road, on the floor… Finally I got sick of seeing everyone riding them…my curiosity got the better of me and I downloaded the Lime App and signed myself up!! I was going to see what the big fuss was all about…I mean I used to have a (cheap and low quality) scooters as a kid…what was so special about this bigger, better, and green scooter?

Anyways,  after about 10 minutes of trying to get it to work…it finally worked…and off I went..sorta…I struggled for a long time trying to tighten the helmet…in the end I gave up …left it loose and just hoped it won’t fall off while riding the scooter..

These scooters differ from the cheap scooter I had as a kid…because its an ELECTRIC scooter!! But to be very honest…It was scary pressing the accelerator for the scooter…so I just pushed with my foot because…

  1. There was too many people on the pavement (it IS in the city)
  2. The pathways are not flat…but bumpy… 😦 and I almost fell off.
  3. It’s not smooth…it would jerk forward suddenly

Anyways…. It’s fun. and probably worth the $5 I spent on it for 10 minute joyride…

But it got me thinking….people enjoy using these scooters for fun, as well as transport…but what about our normal modes of transportation?

articleLeadwide-toyota-yaris-yr-five-door-hatchback12ppq

^My Toyota Yaris:

But then why do I find it a chore to drive a car to work and to places? I don’t seem to have the same joy I did when writing that Lime scooter. There was no thrill or excitement as I drove past the streets of Adelaide. I am not paying for this experience of driving…but isn’t it funny how we pay money to pretend to drive in driving games…or play games where we are impersonating real life..like running a farm or a restaurant LOL..funny.

Then I thought to myself, why don’t I pretend I am doing this for fun! Let’s pretend this is a game…a game where you get to drive and navigate through the streets of Adelaide…Then I drove down some underpass bridge thing and thought..this is actually a really cool game.

So what do you think about treating like a game? Makes it a bit more enjoyable maybe? =S

Sooo we hit 1000 visitors to this blog :D:D!! We are on track for ultimate growth!!

Thank you for visiting :)) 

Click here Support me to write a book !! 

Value Vs Quality

As I have started uni again last month…I realised I don’t actually have a stapler…or at least I can’t find my old one.. 😦 (A tiny stapler I got for free from some law expo my sister went to)..

So I went stapler shopping!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Can I mention how much I love the brand Kikki K?I have diaries, cards, pens and numerous other craft items that I have bought from this wonderful stationary shop. Would I love a Kikki. K stapler? Yes, probably… but the price was a hugggggggggeee turn off for me… 😦 $24.95 for a stapler… >.<” Maybe it’s because I haven’t been working as much I used to..but this is way more than I would pay for a stapler… especially since I only use it for university at the moment..! But it does look great…sturdy..

KikkiK stapler

After being dismayed at the price of a Kikki. K stapler…I went to my second option…KMART! Well known for its cheap. yet still functioning goods. I found this stapler as shown below..for a measly……..TWO BUCKS!! I was like full, take my money! So cheap…On the outside it looks great…!img_0902.jpg

But when I used it I can indistinctly tell its very light and cheap…I don’t know how long it will last…but when tested…it still WORKED. It does the job and it cost 10 times less than what I would of paid for the kikki. K one.

What would you have decided?

Would you choose quality over quantity in this situation?? Or perhaps it depends what it is…

For me if it’s safety or health related issues, I tend to splurge a bit more…I like original brand names for my medications xD!! I also fork out money for health insurance, car insurance, and service my car with certified Toyota mechanics only o.O.

But yeah, for things like stationary, the cheaper the better usually! I got through a high amount of stationary and I am often losing pens and things…so it makes sense not to spend too much on then…I skimp out on food products too…Always looking for the cheap bargains in the supermarkets and waiting  (usually) for things to go on sale….

I don’t know if I made the right choice, getting the cheaper stapler, but so far its doing its job…

Support me on

https://www.gofundme.com/how-to-adult-with-joy-the-book

Why we want to look ‘good’

So I had a discussion with a colleague earlier this week about how this particular person always wears suits to work… I have never seen him not wearing a suit to work…It doesn’t matter how hot, or cold it is…you will always find him wearing a suit.

Out of curiosity, I asked “Do you always wear a suit when out?” and he said, “Yes, I never leave my house without wearing a suit”.  I was like “but WHYYY??” and he said, “It makes him feel good” (Or at least I think he said something like that)… I found that to be pretty incredible/admirable! That must take a lot of time and effort to make sure the suit is ironed, not dirty and that everything matches… But then I thought to myself…girls also put an incredible amount of time in order to prepare to go out…I know some people NEVER leave the house without a face full of makeup…does not matter how far, how long, or how close they are going…who they are seeing…nope ALWAYS have to make up on. I put it down to perhaps how confident we feel about how we look…some people rarely/never wear makeup because they are confident in how they look and don’t care about how others will judge them…

I am not one of them sadly…most days I spend at least half an hour (if I get up in time) to straighten my naturally messy hair..covering up my imperfections on my skin and making sure my clothes look neat…but yeah sadly I did not do that today…and I legit look like a hobo ..when I finally looked at myself in the mirror… 😦 I woke up late and was running late to get to somewhere…and yeah I feel so self-conscious…like is everyone looking at me ?? ? …I guess if trying to look good makes us feel more confident, secure…then why not?

Peace and Joy~

 

~~~

Click here Support me to write a book !! 

How to build Resilience

 

So today I want to talk about resilience… this was a topic brought up in my class earlier this week…

How do we even define resilience?

Why do some people seem more resilient than others? 

How can we develop this resilience?

These are all valid questions that one may have..because I think we all sort of know what resilience looks like…and it can look very different to different people and that’s okay.

For me personally, I would define resilience as someone or something that does not give up even though they are being knocked down time and time again, or they fail again and again…or they seem to be losing, but they do not lose hope. The picture that comes into mind is two people playing a singles game of badminton, there is one player that is clearly better than the other, yet the weaker player are not phased… they are focused, they are not giving up in the face of the competition before them. Despite everyone around them knowing that this is a hopeless battle, they do not admit defeat and do not surrender with out giving the game their best shot. To these people I applaud them..for their bravery of even daring to try. So many times I don’t even want to try at something that looks too difficult or that it would make me look bad…

So why is it that some people seem more resilient than others? Examining those around me…I think of my younger brother, the youngest in the family and the one whom I feel does not have much resilience in the face of adversity yet. At the moment he is looking for a job, but he has not gotten even one interview. Has he given up? Sort of. From all the rejection letters and non responses, he instead spends him time continuing to play games or go out with friends instead of job hunting. He says, it’s the course that I studied-it’s a dead end that leads to no jobs. Sure that may be true, but who said it is the degree that gets you a job? I believe resilience is developed with age, experience and life experiences…and for him whose only every worked one job in his life…which was given to him on a plate…he has narrow view of the working world and what it takes to fight for the hob you want. The world is often a very unfair and unjust world and sometimes we feel like we have to fight our way into opportunities…

How, then can someone develop resilience? If it is so important, then shouldn’t we all work hard to get it? I think it comes in the face of adversity…and also as I learnt in class, it also depends on what else is going in your life at the same time. I believe I am usually a resilient person…I have gone through many trials, tests and set backs…and I have grown stronger through them. However, there is one such dark time in my life, where so many things went wrong at the same time and my world crumbled down…until there was no resilience left in me at all. I lost my job, my relationship broke down and I was diagnosed with a medical diagnosis.   Everything that could possibly be taken from me was taken from me and I was faced with medical costs…no jobs and a lack of insight for my future. At the time, I really had no strength to go on. You know what helped me regain my resilience again? It was the people around me…the family, the doctors, the counsellors and people that I thought would have never been there for me who helped me through. Sometimes we need help to become resilient again. You have to start rebuilding your new normal. You have to write down, reflect and remember what lessons you learnt at that time and remind yourself, you don’t want to be down there again.

I don’t think there is a formula for resilience. But like exercise we can do our best to practice it regularly and when times of adversity come, we can flex those resilience muscles which can hopefully help us through.

Sooo I finally finished my exam… I have spent a lot of my free time this year studying for said exam and now that it is finished…I honestly feel a bit of loss at what to do. Sure I have million things I need to do..But yeah settling into this ‘New Normal’ is both scary yet exhilarating. Isn’t it funny how you only work up a list of all these things you need to do when you don’t have the time to do it? When you do have time, you feel like procrastinating…? Only me? Never mind then! 

Comparisons

Comparisons. Unfortunately, we all do it. Whether or not its intentional or it just happens. It’s hard to avoid, but it can be toxic as.

We compare ourselves in an attempt for us to supposedly feel better.

At least I am not as evil as her!

At least I didn’t make the same mistake as them

At least I am better than them.

We also do it to make ourselves worse…

Why wasn’t I chosen for the new position? I thought I was as good as they were.

If only I was taller, smarter, prettier, richer, popular… as them

How come they get that and I don’t…I wish I was more like them.

Not great examples..but I hope you get my point. In a round about way, and as most motivational self-help hippy guidebooks would probably say…

Just compare yourself to who you were before.

But I mean it doesn’t always work…What if you were fatter now than before? What if you were pretty and then something happened and you aren’t considered pretty anymore?

 

I am not even sure what this post was even supposed to be about. Some sort of ramble about comparing yourself to others being bad. I think we should try avoid it as much as we can. Just sort of see it as, oh okay…I didn’t get the promotion…maybe I am meant to do something else…or perhaps it’s a sign I should look for a new job…if they seem to be overlooking me… I am determined to finish this post on a slightly positive note…

If one door closes, then another is probably about to open…we just have to stop focusing on the closed door…and realise it may have have to be closed to open the way for new opportunities.

Three days to D-Day ….. ;o

Good intentions

Over the last few days…I have been thinking about blog posts that I could write about..ideas that might sound good…and then …I did NOT write them down and now I have forgotten them 😦

Like all things in life, if we do not take grasp of something tightly enough, it will slip from our hands easily…

For example, when I am stressed..I tend to snack more..I don’t eat more food…I just LOVE snacking…whether its nuts, pretzels (yumm), chips…you name it and I probably have eaten it. It is an extremely unhealthy habit of mine….I just stock up and hoard a WHOLE lot of junk food…some which turns out to taste bad…yet I force myself to eat it..because I bought it already you know…so yeah no doubt about it….feed yourself unhealthy things and you become unhealthy!!

Cue the never ending headaches…the pimples :(..the bad sleep…the poor immune system… sads… but yeah but my point is…we have to be careful what we put in our mouths..or our heads… if we think to ourselves we *need* that coffee to survive…that snack to study…then we feed ourselves lies. Because, we can prove ourselves wrong…maybe not on the first, second or even twelfth time…but we can do it ..because with all addictions we started off not being addicted…

It’s sad how addiction has been so closely linked to bad things…I wish more often that I would be addicted to doing good…or being nice…But like all things even doing good should be in moderation…coz if you are so generous you gave away all your money…then ..that’s just a poor decision.

Anyways, I have to stop my procrastination …5 more days to D-Day.. 😮

Rant on Stressing

Call me anti-social…or whatever.. but I don’t enjoy hanging out/spending time with people that I honestly don’t care about. Sounds weird…rude..even but it’s true..Maybe I am weird.? Selfish? I feel like there are many people that I deeply care about that I haven’t had much time to catch up with, I don’t want to waste my time with people who won’t appreciate my presence and vice versa. This might be because lately I’ve been a bit stressed and short on time…

I have been working non-stop everyday…this week was really busy…I had to cover someone as the manager of a hospital dispensary..I’ve only been there on a handful of occasions and this time it really stressed me out! I can tell how stressed I am..I had to work from early morning until well into the night…I cannot believe I used to drive one hour to work -work for 12 hours and then drive one hour home- than repeat several times a week… I think I am getting too old for that…no wonder I was so stressed back then and so so tired. It’s exhausting. When I finally hit the weekends where I only work in the afternoons..I slept till midday…because my body was just tired…I didn’t have time to go to the gym..I didn’t have time to use my phone…No time to see friends…I was too stressed to sleep properly…by the end of the week I had pimples on my face…really dead hair…and a rash on my neck..and just felt groggy..

After my last 12 hour shift on the Friday, I caught up with some friends…and they asked me why I was working so hard? It’s not like I want to work there full time or want a promotion..I think it’s just my own harsh work ethic on myself..I put myself responsible for everything that goes wrong…I feel so bad if I have to make more work for someone else…but at the same time I know I have my limitations and in the end I am just one person. Is it selfish for me to assume so much responsibility? I am just covering someone..yet I feel like I have to try so hard. Who am I trying to impress? I actually could have said NO to covering that person, who just happens to be my boss and manager…

I think maybe its my work ethics that are back to haunt me. I don’t want people to talk down on me and say bad things..sigh why do we try to impress people..but in the end we are just pretending everything is okay? it’s not okay!

There were times at work where I really struggled. I felt so alone. I felt like no one could help me. I didn’t know what to do..and honestly… I just did what I thought would be the best for the patient. I don’t know if it is what other pharmacists would do…what my boss would do..but honestly, though it was a tough week. I realised…there is lots I do not know. I forgot what I did know already. It’s through these tough times we grow muscles. But I think I still need to pace myself… Maybe doing four days in a row there was a bit too much…on the back of working 15 days straight…with minimal sleep and study..It’s not a good combination.

At the end of the stint at the stressful hospital, I caught up with some friends late at night. I just felt I needed to relax. I felt like I lost myself for the past week…All I did was work sleep repeat. I don’t want to live like that anymore…because what is the point? All that extra stress bites into your mental and physical health and then you will end up using the extra money you made to pay for people to make you feel better…its a viscous cycle of madness. Because of the high amount of medical bills you have to pay, then the more you work.

Just need to think about why you want to work and what you are working for…have a vision in front of you and ask yourself “Is it worth it?” I hope it is..

Well, for my reason for working so much is that I want to be able to both go on a holiday overseas AND also put a deposit on my very own house! I want to Marie Kondo the sh*t out of it..hahaha…Don’t get me wrong, I love my current cute house I live in with my parents, but I would love to own my own place that I can call my own and invite friends over without worrying about all the mess……….that is my current house.

What was this post even about?

 

Extroverted Introverts

So I was talking to a colleague at work..he was sitting by himself-not at the staff room having his break. I asked him why he didn’t want to go into the staff room to have his break.. Interestingly he said he didn’t want to talk to people he didn’t know downstairs.

I was quite surprised .. this colleague in my opinion was a very talkative person and seemed to get along with  everyone …I thought he would love to talk to people in his break..

He said it made him tired and took energy away from him..

He said he was actually an introvert…but because of work..he  has to act extroverted.

It made me think…we do live in a world where extroverts seem to thrive in….work places need collaboration..communication and also working with difficult people…Unless you work in a job where you worked by yourself or work all by yourself..it is hard NOT to avoid people.

I think I am quite introverted..as sometimes I do not have energy to talk to people I don’t know…and I just really want to be by myself… But at other times I really do get  bored or feel lonely…and then I will call up a friend to arrange a meeting.

I also established that we are all probably a bit of both…I guess it’s a spectrum…we aren’t always one or the other…but certain situations may force us to be more of one than another. It can be hard….

Have you ever thought what kind of person you are?

On Work Ethics

Disclaimer: I am no model employee, but I do make some observations while at the workplace

I’ve worked in a fair few workplaces over the years…while at University and after graduating.

I observe there are a few types of people out there.and to put them into three super broad categories.

  1. Some who genuinely seem to love their job and gives it their best (rare) 
  2. Those who may not love their job, but still gives it their best (also not that common) 
  3. Those who clearly hate their job and do NOT do their best and clearly don’t care less about their job…but most likely they have been in the job so long that they won’t get fired.

 

  1. Some who genuinely seem to love their job and gives it their best 

Haven’t met so many of these…but they do exist! These types of people are great to work with…they teach you so much, they make work fun and you can tell they like coming to work. They exuberant positive energy and bring kindness wherever they go. They seek to make lives better for other people…whether that’s by being friendly, kind and possibly bringing snacks to share with others to work. I used to try to aim to be this type of person, but I think I’ve started to burn out/wear out over time with dealing with difficult colleagues.

 

2. Those who may not love their job, but still gives it their best  

I would classify myself as this. I don’t hate my job (most of the time), but I do believe I should give it my best…because at the end of the day…they are paying me to be there. They are paying me for my time!~ I don’t want to get fired or set bad examples for other people to follow. I try to get to work early, be organised and try to make sure I leave the workplace in a neat orderly state for whoever is there tomorrow. I think most people fit into this category…

 

3. Those who clearly hate their job and do NOT do their best and clearly don’t care less about their job…but most likely they have been in the job so long that they won’t get fired.

Aside from the bullies, these group of people are the hardest for me to work with. They exuberant negative energy that makes it clear that they don’t want to be there. They arrive late and have a tirade of excuses and reasons why they are late…Usually it is different excuses, but sometimes they get creative. They clearly don’t care about their job and do only the bare minimum to get by. They are not productive at work, they look at the time and only start working at the set time (if they are even there on time). They make people in groups 1 and 2 exasperated because of their lack of willingness to work hard…and it’s tiring being around these people. You know they don’t want to be there, so why are you here? No one is forcing you. Go do something you want to do, or at least do something to make your way there…

 

What type are you? What type would you like to be?