Catch 22 – Research Projects

When you start investigating and looking into doing research, unfortunately you will affect the circumstances that you are in.

Research has not been my strong point or forte unfortunately… I just get overwhelmed, bored, and tired of doing research. Unfortunately, as part of my residency position, I will have to complete a research project. Coming up with a project hasn’t been that difficult, but implementation and designing. Holy shit. So hard..🥲🥲🥲it’s almost been a year, yet I still haven’t been able to even start my project yet. Getting ethics has been a major road block… there are so many hurdles to jump through even before I can even go through to ethics… As a resident, my project has to go through the Education committee before going to the Research Committee, and then finally after they all disseminate my Research Expression of Interest.. then can finally go to the Ethics Committee 🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲 just too hard if you ask me.

It sucks now.. the waiting game before starting the Research.. but I suppose in a years time… maybe I will be pretty happy with where I have ended up? Perhaps I would have finished/close to finishing my research project..

WHO KNOWS

Am I going to make a difference in the world? Maybe not?

I love my project… yet I also hate it with passion. How I long to be a normal employee without all the additional responsibilities, research, and expectations… Yet, I know this is a stepping stone for something greater. Something better. Who knows

Almost the end of 2019…

I think it’s time for a reflection.

Big things, small things, decisions… risks, investments..friendships, relationships, money, time, study, work, career….goals and dreams.

If only we were able to do it all and achieve it all… Sometimes you feel that one life-time is not enough. You feel like there is much to chase after, yet you also fail to appreciate what you have achieved already and what you have.

Sometimes I feel regret at what I sacrifice in order to get closer to what I want to achieve. I question myself, is it worth it? To be so driven towards something that gives you temporary joy when you achieve. I am somewhat afraid that when I finally reach the goals and final destination to where I want to go, I fear it won’t make me as happy as I had hoped.

This fear… will it stop me from trying? I think I will regret most not trying hard enough. But even though i am striving towards my goal…I am also trying to pursue my career goals… and then there’s my bucket list of things I wanna do before I am 30.

I think I am going through what I call a “one third of life crisis”. Not sure what I want, but everyone around me seems to me talking of marriage, getting married, having kids, buying houses… and then there’s me.. not sure what I want to do. I am sure I am not the only one who feels that way though… life is meant to be more simple than we make it. We complicate it by over thinking, by worrying about what hasn’t happened yet… or worrying that something will never happen.

FOMO is so real. I try to avoid it, aside from Linked In and a fake FB account.. I don’t go on social media. But even in the brief moments I have gone on these apps…I’ve managed to make myself feel bad.. I compared myself to this person because they got into medicine this year… oh and this one got a “Senior Pharmacist” position, even though I graduated first!! Or this one got into the hospital residency program…so much to compare myself to…you get my gist. I know I am supposed to feel grateful for where I am, so many would kill to be in my position..two well-paying jobs… good work place… mostly good colleagues…

But sometimes, your brain just shuts down and just wants to run away from it all and just have a break, before your break.

Out of my comfortzone

Today marks a new day where I joined a new gym. Long story short, the all-girls exclusive gym where I had half-price membership – closed down last month 😦 After being a member there so long.. I really really do miss it :(. Unfortunately they will be moving (next year) to a different location that is not close to me anymore. Due to being busy with life, I stopped gymming for a month and just increased the days I played badminton. So instead of once a week, I played about three times a week. I mean, badminton is good and all for stamina development and cardio.. but not so much gaining a more toned body.. which I much desire.

Anyways, this is a momentous occasion, because I’ve never joined a mixed ggm before… I do admit I feel intimidated seeing the guys (and some buff girls) pumping weights heavier than me. 😦

I kinda feel like I’ve been going to a private all girls school and to a public Co-Ed school. LOL. Well, on impulse I’ve joined up for 12 months (more lols coz i wanted to live overseas next year)- guess i ll worry about the consequences of that later.

I’ve been really put out of my comfortzone lately. Flying to Sydney for a wedding in which I only basically knew the person getting married. :/ Sitting on a table in which I knew absolutely noone. Brave? Maybe. I was scared shitless though. So many things. The wonders that travelling to another city makes you do. Syndey.. is not bad actually. Could i live there? Maybe. We’ll see. So many things to do. Yet, Where do I even start?

Hmmm new gym. New job. New haircut… new..??? New instrument to pick up??

That reminds me, I’ve been watching a Chinese Drama called “Untamed”… soo good. Highly recommended if you don’t mind handsome guys, pretty girls, and lotsa action and suspense.! They feature quite a few traditional Chinese instruments and it just looks so cool and I want to learn to play the flute LOL. I swear I used to have one or two of them.. but no idea where it went ;( .

Do you guys often get that sudden inspiration to learn something after watching a show, movie, or reading a book? What inspired you?

How Babies change your life

So yesterday, my sister gave birth to a healthy 3.96kg. 52cm long baby boy! Congratulations!!!

It really is a miracle, or magic of some sort…that a baby can grow in the middle of a womens belly every 9 months and become a living being…it is incredible..yet none of us would be here if it weren’t for this miracle.

If you think about it, carrying a baby around with you for 9 months is quite a self-less act…you have to watch what you eat, what you do, and take numerous supplements and things that are meant to be ‘healthy’ for the baby. Your life becomes so focussed on the baby…

It doesn’t stop at just carrying the baby…after giving birth…you are forever scarred in someway by the method of delivery, for my sister a massive scar where the C-section was conducted. Your body may never be the same again… You have a living being that depends on you to survive.

Without you, it is helpless..you are the one who gives it a life source of nutrients..care and love.

You have to pause your life…maternity or paternity leave for however long…

I imagine that your life would start revolving around your child even as they grow older…You have to take them to school, prepare their lunches, buy uniform, books…go to Student-Teacher Interviews…Fundraisers for school, casual days, birthday parties…deal with conflicts like bullying or some other issue.

It sounds like a big commitment…

So why do so many people choose to give up (?) so much of their time, money, and freedom for their children?

It sounds like such a great sacrifice..

Maybe I don’t understand, because I am not a mother. But truly, mothers and fathers are quite selfless human beings when they brought us into the world.

Sure, they may be far from perfect and at times, even annoying. But they made a decision to raise you, to the best of their ability.

 

Thank you

Life is a game analogy -Part 2- Sushi Go Party

 

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Have you heard of this game? I recently played it with some friends over the Easter Long weekend that just passed! It’s actually really really fun…even though I am incredibly bad at it. 

Despite its initial deceptive cuteness and looking like a light hearted game, it can soon become very competitive as we try to win the race to the be the first at the finish line and you also need some sort of maths skills to add and subtract in this game. Upon reflection after playing this game, I believe that this could teach me, and maybe you a life lesson or two.

Before getting into that, I will explain how this game works, for those who haven’t played before!

Each player starts off with seven cards in their hands, then when the game starts you put  down one card you want to keep and pass the rest of your hand to the person on your left. You receive a new hand from the person on your right…and you repeat..choose a card and then pass the rest on. The round finishes when every one has put down 7 cards and there are no more cards being passed around.

The cards all represent different amounts of points you can get or lose and the description of their points is at the bottom. For example, if you have two tempura cards-you get 5 points (if you just have one you get nothing). There are also eight rules that have been decided upon at the start of the game-that is in the middle of the board. These rules decide how much special combinations of cards are worth…also there are also rewards and penalties for having the most of a card or the least. For example, in our first round we had a rule in which the person who had the most Pudding cards got 6 points, the person who had the least had six points deducted off their total score in a round. In another round, we had a rule that who ever collected four special cards over three rounds would get 12 bonus points.

Upon reflection, I think this game can teach you about spending, saving, and thinking about investments. It might be a long stretch, but it requires you to have to think, What is the best way, with the least risk to get the most points.
In real life, I guess we are playing with money, stocks, shares and other investments. There’s a risk that we will lose out if we don’t have insurance or cover for a particular thing… Just like when you see a Pudding Card come around, you have to think is it worth taking one, just so that you might not be the one with the least amount of pudding cards and get six points deducted, or whether or not you take it, it will happen anyway? In life, we have also have to think and consider, should I get health insurance or car insurance, just in case something happens that I do not foresee and I suddenly have to fork out a huge amount of money? I could be winning by purchasing health insurance and actually use it when needed, or maybe I might be losing money as I never needed it…

While I was playing the game, I was quite defensive and not totally confident. My strategy was to try not get points deducted as much as possible…However, I think this is one of the reasons why I did not do so well; in retrospect. I was so focussed on not losing any points, that I actually didn’t gain any or many points. ..I think for a very big proportion of my life has been spent trying to avoid bad things from occurring… Not trying this incase it doesn’t work out, too scared to do that because what if I get hurt…Not willing to take risks on investment, incase I get scammed… I was just so worried about what might happen, that I forgot that if I focused on getting more points in the first place, those deductions would not have made such a great difference either way. Having no points at all, is like trying to survive without money in the real world…:(

Yes, its a risk to get out there and try…Why? Because you might fail. Because people might laugh at you for trying. Because may try to make you feel like you aren’t enough.

But, you know what? The jokes on them, because you took the risk, you might win big and win the game in the end. (Or you might not, but we don’t talk about that.. ) 

If you have a chance~ Go and and Play Sushi Go Party*~

*Warning- Does require at least primary school maths skills levels to play..*

❤ ❤ <# Click here Support me to write a book !!  ❤ ❤ ❤

#12. How NOT to procrastinate

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Hey there!

Well as the blog title says, this post is about how NOT to procrastinate…I think everyone here already knows how to procrastinate without me teaching them. It’s like an ingrain human attribute that we are unfortunately all born with. 😦

Have you ever had some dreams, goals or big plans in your life…that you kind of…go..oh maybe next year? …Hmm, I don’t think now is the best time right now…Maybe in a few years…etc etc..

I mean, yes sometimes things are beyond our control and we can’t reach our goals..but SOMETIMES okay maybe OFTEN it’s because we are too ‘busy’ procrastinating… Hopefully this post will help give you some tips to stop that procrastination..whether that be the ‘diet you will start tomorrow (since the New Year…it’s only JUNE NOW), the much needed study for the upcoming exams (exam time in Adelaide this month for uni students) or just that goal of becoming a Youtuber which you have procrastinated on (for years).

Well, let’s stop procrastinating with this intro and get into it!

 

  1. Write lists. Literally, to do lists help me not fall apart and it feels SO GOOD TO tick something off the list (after you have done it of course). I have many things that I need to do and sometimes I do forget…BUT if I have a list on my wall, diary or phone, it is wayyy more likely to get done. But the thing is here that you need to remember to check that list to see what you need to do. Set alarms or reminders to help you if you always forget to check. Google Calendar is a great app that you can download for free to help remind you about appointments and etc!
  2. HAVE A DIARY/CALENDER or BOTH. Well, not everyone has a photographic memory and can remember every single event, birthday and things they need to do. Well, my memory is like a goldfish..heh…so yeah I definitely depend on my diary to remind me of catch up with friends, bills to pay or important special days (like exams). It just helps you be a better person! Instead of that bad friend who forgets about your lunch date that you planned 1 year ago…
  3. Have motivational posters around your room! This helps get you motivated and makes you remember WHY you are doing what you are. Be it exams…Remind yourself you want to become a DOCTOR or DENTIST and that’s why you have locked yourself in your room for 12 hours a day studying… Or if your goal is to get fit…maybe photos of your favourite athletes can help inspire you to get fitter. I think what we see often enough, will inspire us to be like that, especially when we feel like we aren’t getting anywhere and demotivated.
  4. Think and remember your goals and learn how to break down the goals into small chunks! You can write this on a piece of paper and stick it on your wall, to remind yourself what you want to achieve in your lifetime. I like to have three types of goals: short, medium and long-term, which helps break down BIG goals into smaller and more achievable goals.

    These goal types are pretty self-explanatory, short-term goals are like small steps to get started of things that I can do NOW to get to the next step..i..e. I want to become part of a hip-hop dance crew, but I don’t know how to dance…So I can either watch and learn from YouTube or sign up for a beginners hip hop class.

    Medium goals are those that you can work on in the near future as a result of the short-term goals. I.e. I have finished and completed the beginners class for hip-hop and now I am in the intermediate class! I am not more confidence in showing off my dancing skills on YouTube or to friends… and I don’t look like a fool! You might even form an amateur dance crew for fun!

    Long-term goals are those that might be in a few weeks, months or years. These are not achievable straightaway and involve an investment of lots of time, money and practice! So a long-term goal for this dancing thing is that you could audition and get accepted into a professional dance crew and perform in competitions and do performances professionally.

  5. Use watches and alarms! It is important to try sleep and wake up at the same time each day. Efficient people never sleep in (on purpose)… They wake up each day EARLY and make the most of all the time they have while they are awake. They usually have a set morning routine each day to get them ready…they don’t lie in bed for two hours playing with their phone and then when they wake up to spend another two hours in bed watching Youtube (guilty as charged..). If you are tempted to use your phone in bed, time yourself so that you know exactly how much time you are wasting and feel guilty .. hahaha… it’s always good to be mindful of the time so that you can waste less time procrastinating and actually get things done son!
  6. I am going to chuck in meditating in here …Just because…I am not sure about you, for me, it is really hard to sit there and do nothing and just breathe…It becomes easier as your practice it more…but yeah when I meditate I get reminded of all the stuff I NEED to do. So I make a mental note of everything I need to do post-meditation…usually, unless it’s super urgent like a tablet I forgot I needed to take. meditation is good for calming your mind and your anxiety levels. Definitely, recommend.
  7. Have friends or family keep you accountable for the goals that you set out to do and help keep you on track. I am pretty guilty of trying to do too much or trying to run away from the important goals in my life… Sometimes I get put off by how big the mountain or hurdle is, that I want to run away and go down a slippery slope instead of climbing the mountain. But, I am lucky to have friends who remind me and encourage me not to give up and to keep climbing, because I have already climbed halfway. Thank you, friends!
  8. Last but not least, take time to reward yourself and to reflect! Rewards could be anything! For example, you could study for 45 minutes and then give yourself 15 minutes break to do anything (timed of course). Or you could reward yourself with a healthy snack (or unhealthy). If you complete a bigger goal, like passing an exam, you might be able to reward yourself with new clothes or something you wanted to buy for ages…This is like almost bribing yourself to get off your ass and to stop procrastinating!  It is also very important to reflect on how far you have come at regular intervals and I don’t think it is a bad thing to feel content and proud of how you far you have come! You might not be there, but at least you are going somewhere!

    I hope that this post motivates you to think about something that you have been putting off…There is no better day than today to start!

    SO what are you waiting for?

    Stop procrastinating and ‘FOLLOW’ My blog for email updates for when I post!

    Question: What is one goal in like that you have been procrastinating to do?

    Take care and see you next post!

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